You know that chill that runs down your spine when your partner reveals to you that they are moving away for school, work or personal purpose. The worry on your face as you mourn your relationship.” How are we going to cope? Distance spoils everything”.” What if they find someone better than me over there? “. The questions keep flooding your mind. You just found the absolute love of your life and you have to let them go. Long distance relationships can be scary and seem almost impossible. If this is your dilemma then don’t fret. These are some tips for a long distance relationship to work.
How to Make Long Distance Relationships Work
1. Communicate with Each Other Constantly
Communication is vital for every relationship. For long-distance relationships, this is your lifeline. You have to keep your communication lines open. Talk about everything. check up on each other when you can. The most important thing is that you communicate.
If you have a different time zone, you may want to find a convenient time for your bot to talk. You can video chat via Skype, face time or even WhatsApp.
Just make sure you find a means of communication that works for both of you.
2. Send Each Other Presents
Presents do not have to be limited because you cannot hand them over personally. With technology, everything has been made easy. You can order them something you know they like online and have it delivered to them. You can also ask the courier service to help you attach a love note to the present.
This way, you remind your partner that although you are miles apart, you are always thinking of them.
3. Do Something Fun
You might be wondering how this is possible since you are apart. It is very achievable, all thanks to technology. You can play games online and challenge each other. Maybe you can join an online book club or even recommend movies for each other. You both watch it alone and then talk about the movie over the phone. You can read to each other over the phone or learn to cook a meal together over any video chat app.
The most important thing is that you can still enjoy each other’s company and spend time together even if you aren’t physically together.
4. Trust Your Partner
Trust issues are one of the biggest killers of long distance relationships. This is one of the tips for a long distance relationship you do not want to overlook. If you do not trust your partner, you will always doubt them. Your mind will play games with you until you kill yourself with worry and end up with high blood pressure.
Unless your partner has given you reasons to doubt them, do not assume they are cheating on you. No relationship works without trust. As long as they have earned it, trust them!
6. Talk About your Expectations
People go into relationships for different reasons so you might want to make sure that you and your partner are on the same page. You do not want to be holding on to someone who is not committed to you. Talk about your level of commitment.
Are you allowed to go on dates with other people?
Is the relationship exclusive or are you in an open relationship?
Is this relationship leading to marriage or is it for fun?
Are you two compatible with each other?
You do not want to put in your effort in a relationship that doesn’t mean anything to your partner. You should make this clear so you know where you stand.
7. Do Not Be Careless
Sometimes we can get so used to being single we forget we are in a committed relationship. Make sure you do not get caught up in dangerous situations. If doing something will make your partner upset or fuel their insecurities, do not do it. For example, being in the club with a friend of the opposite sex at an odd time. Even if you are not doing anything wrong, you’ll give your partner a wrong idea and you will open room for doubt.
If you must do that, let them know before you go and be as transparent as possible.
8. You Need to Reassure Them A Lot
Distance can very well fuel doubts and insecurities. When you have negative friends and family members, it is even worse. There will be people telling both you and your partner that the other is unfaithful. They may even mean well and think they are looking out for you. How do you make sure your partner is secure? You have to make them feel secure.
Remind them that you love them and you choose them. Reassure them twice as much as you would if they were with you in person. Know their love language and speak it to them.
9. Always Have Your ‘Me Time’
Being around your partner can limit the things you can do since you have to spend time with them and consider them when making decisions. See the distance as an opportunity to work on yourself and build an identity for yourself.
You can learn a new skill, travel to places you’ve always wanted to visit, find a new hobby, get some more quality time with your family and friends and just enjoy being single. You do not have to put your life on hold.
Live your life to the fullest.
Check out how single people rock and enjoy their lives and emulate them.
10. Find Healthy Ways of Resolving Conflicts
Fighting over the phone can move from bad to worse very quickly and when the conflict is left to linger, it grows into resentment. You might want to make sure that every little disagreement and misunderstanding are addressed on time and communicated effectively. I’d advise that you refrain from fighting over text. missing one punctuation can change the meaning of a sentence.
Because they are not hearing the tone of your voice or seeing your facial expression, there’s so much room for misinterpretation. You have to be willing to apologize when you are wrong and forgive when you have been offended. It will also help to make sure that you settle all your issues before you go to bed every day.
That is how couples settle their disputes amicably.
Bonus: Pay Each Other Surprise Visits
One of the very important tips for a long distance relationship is bridging the distance. As often as you can, visit your partner. I know sometimes the distance is across oceans and visiting might be difficult but if you have the means, please do. It will help to keep the hope of the relationship alive. Your partner needs to see you, feel you, smell you and be reassured that they are not dating a ghost.
You can even make it fun by paying them a surprise visit. I can only imagine how overwhelmed and excited they’ll be.
Conclusion
Long distance relationships may seem hard but they are achievable. You just have to remind yourself why you chose your partner in the first place and see the upside. Always be positive. If you believe it will work and put in the work, it will.
These tips for a long distance relationship are here to help you. When you get a chance at love, fight for it. Distance got nothing on you! You’ll be fine.
Have you ever been in a long distance relationship or currently in one? Tell me what’s t like in the comments.
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