A relationship is a way in which two people or two groups feel about each other and behave towards each other. To me, a relationship is when two people in love with each other are ready to break all odds to be together and planning to keep it that way till death do them part. If a relationship is like that, then there is a need for one to know how to make it right to avoid unforeseen ugliness later thus: Things to do at the start of every relationship.
Recommended Things to Do at the Start of Every Relationship
1. Be Ready for The Relationship
Being in a relationship is like a full-time job, don’t think about applying if you are not ready
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Yes, being ready is one of the things to do at the start of every relationship. It is paramount that before you start anything in life, you need to be physically and emotionally ready to be able to achieve your goal. Relationships can’t be excluded.
Ask yourself these questions about your partner: “Who is this person to me?” and “Why am I taking them as a partner”. The first question will tell you how important they are to you or otherwise, while the second question tells you reasons why you should proceed with the relationship or bailout.
Any outcome short of your expectations could be a bad idea to venture in; make a wise decision – a decision future you won’t say “I wish I never started this relationship”
2. Be Yourself
Being oneself is the best way to live one’s life. You can’t be someone else. Never. Trying to be someone else in a relationship is a wrong move. Let your partner know the real you so they can decide whether or not you are good to go. Let them love and respect you for who you are.
Though if you have a habit generally regarded as unacceptable, you will need to let go because nobody likes bad habits.
So, be yourself!
3. Know Your Genotype and Blood Group
These are two of the five medical tests you should have before marriage. Genotype is the genetic makeup of an individual passed from the parents. We have 4 types of genotypes: AA, AS, SS, AC. The first three are common while the other isn’t.
Blood group on the other hand is the carrying of two antigens (A and B) during the transportation of oxygen by red blood cells. The antigens determine the blood group of an individual. The blood groups are represented with A, AB, O, and B.
It is important for a couple in a relationship wanting to settle down or otherwise to know their genotypes and blood groups before they are deeply in love. Any wrong combination could be a lifetime disaster. Break up if you two are not compatible; this will prevent giving birth to children with sickle cell thereby, making life difficult for both the parents and the child.
You can also read on the importance of knowing your blood group and genotype before marriage here.
4. Don’t Compare Your Partner to Your Ex
We, humans, have the proclivity of comparing things that we have now with those that we once had. If you have been in one relationship or the other before your present partner, you need to shut that memory dead no matter how memorable they are. You can’t be comparing your partner with another person; it’s a huge deal-breaker.
For the relationship to foster, you need to see your partner as unique in their way. No one is perfect!
5. Make Sure There is Constant Communication
Communication is key to a flourished relationship. Since you are at the beginning of the relationship, make sure to check up on your partner regularly; not too regularly that they get bored of you.
Ensure you keep reassuring them that they are a part of you. That can be achieved greatly through constant communication.
During disagreements, things can be set straight if communication is done effectively. Of course, not every couple even know how to communicate without starting an argument. We all know that no relationship is problem-free but with communication, it reduces significantly.
6. Be Honest
Honesty as one of the things to do at the start of every relationship, is a moral character that defines a person as trustworthy, straightforward, loyal, fair, sincere, and not characterized by lying, theft, etc. You will need to be all of these and more to be tagged ‘honest’.
Do not give your partner any room to doubt you; doubt kills a relationship faster than infidelity. Always be truthful in whatever you say or do.
The moment they realize you have been untrue to them or you have something up your sleeves, BOOM! That ends it. You wouldn’t want that, right?
7. Be Very Observant
I do not believe in the cliché ‘love at first sight but rather ‘attraction at first sight’. You are attracted to them and have even considered dating them, but you can’t afford to be relaxed. NO. You can’t sit back and fold your arms thinking everything is right simply because of that attraction. That’s a very dumb thing to do.
Every little detail counts. Observe your partner’s move and attitude every now and then (I do not mean like a spy, stalker or secret agent), no. You need to be sure they are worth going on that long journey with you. After your observation, make a choice.
Wise man see, wise observed, wise man then is compelled to do all which is right to all that he has observed earlier.
Gary Tolan aka King Tola
8. Set Boundaries
To have a healthy relationship, you need to set some boundaries. You need to let your partner know about your likes and dislikes, dos and don’ts, and make sure they are strongly adhered to. If they care about you and the relationship, they will never try to trespass those boundaries intentionally. If you notice otherwise, then be sure to have an uncomfortable relationship if you choose to continue.
Don’t forget to respect your partner’s likes and dislikes too. Respect should be reciprocal.
9. Look Out for Compatibility
Compatibility in a relationship means that both partners understand and accept each other’s life philosophy and goals, as well as genuinely enjoy being around each other without feeling preoccupied with what they feel needs to change within their partner.
A relationship is said to be compatible if both partners are willing to agree on certain core values irrespective of their differences.
You need to look out for compatibility as one of the things to do at the start of every relationship. Make sure you agree on things like dress sense, social status, intellect, likes and dislikes, and so on.
Is your partner like you? You can answer this question even though the relationship might be early, but you can still tell it is or isn’t by applying your observational skills.
10. Know Your Partner’s Family Lineage
In addition, one of the things to do at the start of every relationship is by knowing your partner’s family lineage. Ascertain whether or not your partner’s family has any trace of hereditary diseases such as Muscular dystrophy, sickle cell, Huntington’s disease, haemophilia, tay-sachs and cystic fibrosis. Diabetes is also a hereditary sickness – lookout for it.
With that said, no one would want to venture into a relationship where their partner’s family lineage has hereditary diseases. It’s for your children’s sake, so don’t compromise!
Conclusion
You need to know or do all the above-mentioned things quickly before you get too attached. If you get too attached before doing or noticing, it will be difficult for you to leave. You will end up making compromises, and my dear, making too many compromises bring down a relationship.
If you find this article worthwhile, please leave your thoughts in the comments section. You could also tell us if there are things that I missed out.
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