14 ways to Keep the Romance Alive After Having Kids

Updated: Dec 19, 2021
By Happiness Hassan
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Keeping the romance alive after a baby is quite difficult to attain but not impossible. This is because with the arrival of a child the love begins to diminish as the mother’s love, care, and affection are diverted towards the well-being of the baby. Indeed, this change is necessary but when it leads to the abandonment of the father it becomes a challenge.

However, as a man in such a position, it’s required that you understand the connection between mothers and their children. Furthermore, refusing to heed to the inner voice of quitting or cheating on your wife. In contrast, speak to her about it and together you can spark up your romance life again by applying the methods outlined in this post.

Ways to Keep the Romance Alive After A Baby

1. As a Couple do Things Together

The more time you both spend together the more alive your love life will be. Sometimes, the kids may appear to be a hindrance, but in real life, there are not. This implies that you both get engaged in doing the activities related to the kids together like school activities.

Afterwards, you both are now free to do other things together like house chores, shopping, cooking, swimming, riding a bike, reading a romantic book, going to the movies among others.

2. Set Aside Date Night

It’s wrong to stop the fun activities you both normally do before the kids arrive because of their presence. Although it may not be regular, such activities help in keeping the romance alive after a baby. Having a date night is a perfect medium that helps you fall in love with your spouse again.

However, during this period you don’t have to worry about the kids simply taking them visiting a trusted friend or inviting someone over to stay with them.

3. Revisit Your Partner’s Love Languages

Every individual has their distinct love language that communicates effectively what love truly is to them. For some it’s gifts, others physical touches(hug, kisses) while others may be words of affirmation.

Love languages are diverse and vary from person to person. Perhaps, you’ve stopped speaking your partner’s love language as a result of the kid’s arrival, it’s about time you revisit it and begin to use them.

4. Romance Comes Alive When You Engage in Your Partner’s Hobbies

Hobbies are activities one finds interesting and satisfying. As couples, you can leverage this medium to show how much you love, care and value your partner. It’s always romantic when you and your spouse play his/her favourite sports or games.

5. Arrange a Surprise Package For Your Partner

Sincerely, everyone loves surprise packages that are beautiful, most especially when coming from the one they promised to spend the rest of their lives with. It must not be an expensive package, remember it’s the heart that gives that counts the most.

A perfect guide for this is to familiarize yourself with your spouse’s likes and dislikes.

6. Talk About Everything Everyday

Irrespective of how busy your everyday schedule may be, create time to talk with your spouse within that schedule, that’s why you must learn how to balance work and family.

After a day, learn to ask your spouse how they spent their day and see where you may be of help. Love is built upon the foundation of effective communication and listening.

7. Hang Out With Other Couples

Don’t be cut in the web of boredom with your partner doing nothing. Hanging out with other couples gives you ideas and strategies to apply in keeping the romance alive after a baby.

Interestingly, these other couples can relate to what exactly you might be experiencing in your romantic life. Hence, feel free to share with them your struggles.

8. Visit Places With Your Partner

Nothing is as loving as travelling to fun places having the one you dearly love right next to you. It’s soul refreshing! Therefore, select a suitable location together with your partner or you could make it as a surprise package for your partner.

While doing this, ensure you keep away every form of distraction—switch off your phone, lock up every form of official duty and keep the kids away.

9. Utilize the Social Media Platform to Profess Your Love

To revive your romance life, spice it up by showing the world how much your partner means to you on your social media handles. Husbands, it’s about time you stop advertising just your businesses on your handles, learn to include your wife’s pictures telling how much you cherish her.

Read: Does Social Media Ruins Relationships? Check Here

Similarly, wives, stop posting just you and your kids on your handles and spice it up with your husband’s photos. In addition, engage more in sending romantic text messages, emails, and letters.

10. Learn to Appreciate Your Spouse

Everyone loves to feel valued and celebrated. Therefore, employ these same tactics in keeping the romance alive after a baby in your marriage. Never let a day go by without complimenting your partner’s outlook.

Most importantly, when they put on something new or achieve something great. Be proud to identify with them publicly and privately as their spouse.

11. Physical Touches Communicates Affection

What’s holding you back from hugging, or kissing your spouse? All these little physical touches reunite you with your partner the more you engage in it.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with hugging your spouse while in the presence of others including your kids.

12. Take Care of Your Physical Looks

The arrival of kids should not be an excuse for you to abandon your physical looks, appearing shabby and unkept—most especially the mothers. Looking untidy diminishes the romance in your marriage. However, maintaining an attractive outlook makes your partner enjoy spending the rest of their life with you all over again.

13. Learn Something New Together

Keeping the romance alive after a baby is made possible when you and your spouse learn something new together, it could be a skill or a game. Doing this encourages teamwork, unity, and Harmony which is reflected in other aspects of your lives.

14. Spice up Your Bedroom Life

As a couple ensure your bedroom is looking all beautiful, neatly arranged, and decorated with all sorts of flowers, cards, lights that show love in the air.

Having such an atmosphere in your bedroom sets the mood for other intimate activities—don’t hesitate to try it out.


Restoring your romantic life after having a baby is not all about sex, although it’s important. However, trying the above-listed things can spark up your romance life again. Bear in mind that you must not do big, expensive stuff to prove your love—little things count.

Therefore, what’s your best way of restoring diminishing romance after the arrival of kids? 

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