How to Help Victims of Sexual Abuse

Updated: Mar 27, 2022
By Musa Bala
Should Married Couples Post their Pictures Online?

Should Married Couples Post their Pictures Online?

Should couples continue to post their pictures online after marriage? In this age of technology, it has become normal for couples to post their pictures online. Others even go as far as posting every single detail of their lives. Even with everyone genuinely wishing...

Should Parents Join Snapchat? Here is What the Experts Say

Should Parents Join Snapchat? Here is What the Experts Say

Social media has evolved to provide many intriguing features. One great platform that offers these features and more is Snapchat. Therefore, you're not the only parent worried about their teen's activities on Snapchat and who desires to monitor it. Should parents join...

7 Easy Ways to Get Babies to Sleep at Night

7 Easy Ways to Get Babies to Sleep at Night

The heart of a mother swells with joy to see her baby sleeping peacefully and calmly, likewise the father of the child. Sadly, the joy turns soar when you can't get your baby to sleep at night, oftentimes, you begin to panic, wondering what could be wrong with your...

The Best 12 Educational TV Shows for Kids

The Best 12 Educational TV Shows for Kids

One of the children's favorite activities is watching TV. With thousands of TV programs airing today, it is important to pick educational TV shows for kids that will educate and influence them, positively. As a child, I remember wanting to rush home from school...

Sexual abuse victims often experience a range of reactions and emotions from pain, anger, hate, helplessness, and other challenges that negatively affect their mental health. As different victims feel differently about their experiences, it can be difficult to know what to do or say to help sexual abuse victims.

When your loved one or someone you know has been sexually assaulted, the best thing you can do is to make yourself available. It’s also important to actively listen if they decide to share their experiences with you. Listen non-judgementally and remind them that they are not to be blamed for what happened and that they didn’t deserve what they experienced. This is important because most victims of sexual assault tend to blame themselves for what they experienced.

It is also important for you to sympathise with their situation, try to acknowledge how the abuse has affected their lives, and reassure them that they are not alone and you’ll be there for them if they need your support.

Sexual abuse victims often develop certain behavioural changes in response to the extremely life-threatening experience they had. To help sexual abuse victims, knowing these changes are important. Some of these changes could be some or all of the following:

  • Paranoia
  • Self-blaming and feelings of worthlessness
  • Loss of interest in activities once enjoyed
  • Changes in sleep patterns (either too much or not enough)
  • Difficulty concentrating
  • Withdrawal from family and friends
  • Nightmares and flashbacks
  • Changes in appetite and weight
  • Depression
  • General mistrust in people
  • Suicidal thoughts
  • Anxiety

These changes in behavior are not specific to sexual abuse, anyone going through a major mental challenge could exhibit these symptoms. However, they could serve as indicators that your loved ones and friends are struggling to cope with trauma which could be sexual abuse.

As a close person to a family member or friend, you could be a judge of their behavior and can easily tell when they are acting in a typical manner for no apparent reason. Don’t be afraid to ask them questions directly about your observations, your actions could be the starting point to their recovery as it often leads to getting help for sexual abuse victims.

How to Assist Sexual Abuse Victims

As explained earlier, sexual abuse develops emotions and reactions that negatively affect the mental and sometimes physical wellbeing of the victim. If you are not a victim yourself you may not be able to fully understand what they are going through, leaving you confused about how to best support them. Here is what you need to do to help sexual abuse victims.

1. Pay Attention to Them (if they wish to speak)

One of the most important things you could do for a sexual abuse victim is to be available for them, listen to them if they decide to talk about what happened. Don’t try to force or pressure them into sharing their experience, allow them to do that on their own will. They may want to express frustration, anger, or sadness about what happened, listen to them non-judgementally, and support them.

Having someone to talk to and count on is a good means for a sexual abuse victim to express their emotions about their experience and possibly seek further help.

2. Maintain Your Composure

Once you’ve learned that your friend or loved one was sexually abused, it is common for you to feel anger or shock by what they’ve been through. However, expressing anger or shock might make the victim even more confused or more pain.

Also, avoid making threats against the perpetrator. You might think doing that is being supportive, but that could make the experience even more stressful for the victim.

3. Maintain Confidentiality

It is important for you to understand this experience isn’t yours or about you, and as such not your story to tell. Let the victim decide who to share their story of sexual abuse with.

Don’t share your loved one or friend’s experience without their permission. Most sexual abuse victims develop feelings of embarrassment and shame. Sharing their experience with others without their permission would only deepen the wound.

4. Establish Boundaries

Being a good listener and supportive goes a long way in providing help to sexual abuse victims. However, make sure not to do that at the expense of your own health and responsibilities. Set a time and condition that works for both of you. Don’t let your loved one or friend’s experience consume you as it will not be helpful to either of you.

Know that for you to be supportive, you have to be healthy first.

5. Educate Yourself

The most important way to be of help to sexual abuse victims is to educate yourself about their experience. While you can’t fully understand what they’re going through, except if you were a victim yourself, try to research available resources on how sexual abuse victims feel and how you can support them.

Getting yourself educated, would dispel any misconceptions you might have about sexual abuse and give you a foresight about what the victim’s recovery looks like.

6. Pay Attention to the Victims

As earlier stated, sexual abuse victims feel a range of emotions and this can be different in victims, including the way they react. It helps a lot if you watch out for odd behaviors that may suggest they are going through crises, this could be excessive crying, nightmares or flashbacks, or talking about dying.

If you should observe any of these, encourage them to reach out to a mental health professional.

7. Extend Invitation

Sexual abuse victims tend to withdraw and isolate themselves. Don’t be surprised when they refuse to join you in an activity, but that doesn’t mean that you should give up on them. Continue to invite them to things even if they decline, they’ll still appreciate the invite.

This reassures them that they are loved and valued especially at times such as this which they feel alone.

8. Encourage Therapy

The journey to recovery from sexual abuse is a difficult one and this is different for different victims. However, with therapy, this difficulty can be effectively addressed.

Encourage the victim to consider therapy but do not insist. Therapy can only help a sexual abuse victim when the victim is willing to work towards healing.

Conclusion

It is not easy or a one-time process to help sexual abuse victims. The healing process is a long one and you have to remind them that you are still available if they need you, this is so you allow them to make the decision themselves. This gives them a sense of control in their lives after experiencing a situation they have no control over.

Remember you can only provide support to the victim through the healing process but you can’t heal them yourself.

Popular Reads

Everything on JUMIA

0 Comments

Submit a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

Whats new?
Signs That a Child is Being Abused

Signs That a Child is Being Abused

Children who are victims of abuse struggle to cope in life mentally, emotionally, physically, and intellectually. Oftentimes, they have to live with the scars forever. Therefore, due to the increasing rate of child abuse and the stigmas attached, parents, guidance,...

40 Adorable Daughter Quotes from Mom to Daughter

40 Adorable Daughter Quotes from Mom to Daughter

The vast majority of moms are their daughters' first best friends, and this is one of the most profound and enduring friendships on the planet. As a result, letting go of their daughter, regardless of her age, is difficult. In response to this, a few daughter quotes...

This Is How Much It Costs to Educate a Child in Northern Nigeria

This Is How Much It Costs to Educate a Child in Northern Nigeria

When you think of what your child’s education is going to cost, you probably think of the expenses you cover yourself. From tuition fees, school books and uniforms to daily lunches, transportation to and from school, and extra educational materials at home, the costs...

8 Ways of Dealing With Nigerian Parents

8 Ways of Dealing With Nigerian Parents

My parents are extremely strict you may say as a Nigerian child, and you're currently finding out a thousand ways of dealing with strict Nigerian parents, just to air your views and be independent. 'Why can't I have my freedom for once', 'sincerely, I feel like a...

Why Flexibility is More Important than Consistency in Parenting

Why Flexibility is More Important than Consistency in Parenting

Setting rules helps everything go as planned. However, when it comes to parenting, flexible parenting plans should be adapted in place of rules. This is because rules have consequences attached to them and these consequences hurt children. Furthermore, consistency...

9 Funny Things Nigerian Parents Say to Their Children

9 Funny Things Nigerian Parents Say to Their Children

I'm sure you'll agree with me that Nigerian parents do an amazing job raising their children. As a result of the funny things Nigerian parents say to their children while raising them, one would say that they are the funniest parents on the planet. When a person...

8 Activities to Help Your Child Grow Emotionally

8 Activities to Help Your Child Grow Emotionally

Humans react differently to things and situations happening around them or to them. However, irrespective of the differences, it can be broadly classified into positive and negative reactions. For instance, when challenges occur with no hope of a solution, the vast...

14 ways to Keep the Romance Alive After Having Kids

14 ways to Keep the Romance Alive After Having Kids

Keeping the romance alive after a baby is quite difficult to attain but not impossible. This is because with the arrival of a child the love begins to diminish as the mother's love, care, and affection are diverted towards the well-being of the baby. Indeed, this...

When and How to Have the ‘Talk’ with your Daughter

When and How to Have the ‘Talk’ with your Daughter

There comes a time in every girl's life when she needs to hear the 'Talk'. This discussion is quite different from every other she might have had in the previous years and must be accurately communicated to her from a trusted source—parents. Do you ever wonder how to...

Explore more

You May Also Like…

No Results Found

The page you requested could not be found. Try refining your search, or use the navigation above to locate the post.