How to Improve Communication Skills for Your Significant Other

Updated: Nov 8, 2021
By Aisha Zakari
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“Communication is Key.”

We’ve all heard this saying before, it’s not only relating to relationships but also friendship, family, work, and business. Communication is key to any successful relationship. May I add even to any healthy relationship? Yes!

Communication is expressing, sharing, showing, and voicing ideas, feelings, emotions, and even signals from the eyes to body language and even hands. It is about expressing yourself, paying attention to your significant other. In addition, with communication comes listening and understanding, with both – an effective relationship.

You could be a great talker in a relationship but not a listener or be a listener and not a talker, it doesn’t work that way. You have to be both giving and receiving the same energy you want from your partner. It’s essential in a relationship to communicate. It may sound simple and easy, but remember, it’s always the little things that matter and makes a vast difference.

Yes, couples quarrel and disagree but they try to do so in a compassionate and effective way to save their relationship and do little things to reach out to each other to avoid getting things out of control. Be observant about the little things. Here are ways to improve communication in a relationship;

10 Ways to Improve Communication in Your Relationships

1. Ask Questions Like: How was your day?

This question can be answered by just anyone with “I’m fine” but coming from your partner is different, completely different.

Be extra. This question should be answered in detail, talk about how your day went, what you ate, how you got to work, how your boss looked so funny, or what you did all day.

With this question, you’re in touch and in sync with your partner. It also helps you both communicate as you both don’t run out of what to say and even if you do, tomorrow is another day to keep it going. Check in with your partner every day!

This is a way to improve communication in a relationship, invest in it.

2. Avoid Overthinking It

Did he do this? Did he do that?

Hey! Stop that! It takes two to work in a relationship. Stop overthinking about what they are doing. It’s always never worth it. You end up getting worked up over nothing. Instead, reach out to your partner and talk to about ways to improve communication in the relationship.

Assuming, expecting, and overthinking lead to disappointment and your feelings getting hurt.

3. Be a Good Listener

You could be a great talker but are you a listener?

A listener in a relationship is someone who instead of walking out of a relationship actually stays back to understand where their partner’s point of view is coming from. Listen and understand why they got upset over something you think is trivial or listen to what they have to say overcoming late to a romantic date. When you talk, listen, and understand. That is the effort, a way to improve communication in the relationship.

A partner should have this quality to make a relationship peaceful.  A partner should listen, understand, and always try to forgive. Relationships can be bumpy, trust me, I have been there but I still believe it takes two to work, always. Furthermore, you have to understand and try to make amends wherever you both might be wrong.

4. Encourage Communication Between You Two

Communicating gives you an effective edge to solving problems and gives you an effective relationship and a happy attitude. Problems can be solved by communicating, understanding where you went wrong, and of course, forgiving, and letting go.

To be in a relationship is to forgive because you will be with a whole different person who has to know and understand you. They are not you and you are not them. What pisses you off might not piss them off but when you do piss them off, acknowledge it and tender an apology. It inevitably grows the relationship as you get to know and understand them in the process.

Every moment is an opportunity to connect with your significant other – always respond when they try to communicate. If your partner is trying to reach out, be there for them – this is a way to improve communication in a relationship and they are showing you they want to try with you.

Talk about future plans together, your sex life, where and how you both can improve in the relationship, and how to be each other’s support system. Make efforts to meet up with your partner’s emotional needs.

5. Avoid Caviling

Avoiding finding fault or criticizing your partner is one of the ways to improve communication in a relationship. Cavilling is criticizing, blaming or finding fault in your partner over unimportant and frivolous reasons.

“Arrrgh, you did this the last time”

“This is all your fault”

These are two different scenarios, I’ll explain.

The first talks about “the last time”. This tells you this partner held on to something he/she did the last time and a repeat of it ticked them off. This is a NO when you’re in a relationship.

You should address an issue and tell your partner how that made you feel, how it affected you. Shit happens, we all know that. Your partner could do something or you could do something wrong, immediately talk it out. Don’t hold grudges. Don’t build their wrongs up. Such piling leads to bigger misunderstandings and quarrels, and that is not healthy for a relationship.

The second focuses on “your fault”. You should not nitpick or point blames to your partner over unnecessary issues that could be addressed. Resolve issues calmly. Listen first and then respond.

Remember, you don’t always have to be right and that’s why “I’m sorry” exists. Be sincere about the apology and pick the right time to discuss the issue.

6. Talk about Planned Schedules

“Hey babe, remember the meeting/deal I told you about? It’s happening today. I’ll talk to you later tonight, say 11 pm. Do take care and I love you”

Little things matter as I said. This is a “major little thing”. Here, this partner is telling and wanting his significant other to know how stressful his day will be and what time he’ll talk to her so she doesn’t worry about him. Thoughtful, right?

It means they are communicating and also reassuring their partner that they have them in their heart and will definitely reach out when they have themselves back.

This little thing is communication all in one because they know their partner will worry about them and of course, they are saying the love word – and improving communication in the relationship.

7. Always Show Appreciation

“Thank you for letting me know this beforehand. I wish you the very best of luck, babe. Of course, you’re that luck in my life. You’ve got this. I love you”

This is another effort this lover is putting to reply to his/her significant other’s message. He/she is appreciating and expressing gratitude that their partner took out the time to let them know about their schedule for the day. They are also showing support and believing in their partner and of course, telling them they are lucky in their life to boost their confidence.

You see, relationships are about effort and energy.  This message might just be words but it tells a lot about their efforts and energy. More so, the way to improve communication in a relationship is by showing appreciation and gratitude for something thoughtful your partner does. It’s quite simple, you know.

Thank you

8. Compliment Each Other

“You’re beautiful”

“You’re smart, my wonderful man”

“You make me feel better”

“I love your eyes, your big eyes”

“I love your butt”

Always keep telling your partner what you love and appreciate about them even in the relationship. Don’t stop when you’re in a relationship. Everyone loves reassurances in a relationship, I know I do.

Getting too comfortable with each other should be a good thing as it gives you chances to communicate effectively and express yourself however you want and of course, say naughty words.

9. Discuss Your Sex Life

“I like this better”

“I like it more when you moan directly to my ear”

“I like it when you twirl your tongue”

These are ways to improve communication in a relationship – it involves a comfortable conversation around your sex life and it is effective as it makes you both better and connected.

 You should discuss your sexual fantasies with your significant other, that’s why it’s essential to be comfortable around each other. It enhances your connection, trust, excitement, and leads to better sex and a rewarding relationship.

10. Don’t Forget to Flirt!

Keep up with the flirting and the complimenting. There are a lot of nasty words and gestures that get your partner riled up, blushing, and all giddy. You need that, it is healthy.

As a lady, you could just take off your clothes in a sexual manner while your partner stares at you, get all nasty and naughty as you bite down your lip. Keep up with eye contact. It matters.

Don’t lose this, it’s exciting. You necessarily don’t need to get dirty, do it for fun. Laugh about it, enjoy it. Enjoy every flirty feeling, it helps in building the relationship.

Conclusion

The reality is really, little things matter. A partner who loves and is observant about you will know what ways to improve communication in a relationship and fix upon where they might be wrong. So, build that relationship with communication.

Furthermore, having a strong base, a strong foundation goes a long way in making communication easy for you. Relationships get bumpy along the way but trust me, it is beautiful with the right person. Communicate, Understand. Love like it’s your first!

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