I Was That Romeo, Who Lost True Love to Shyness

Updated: Jan 8, 2022
By Abdulganiyu Ibrahim
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Please note that, while this story is true, the names of the characters have been changed to protect their identities.

Initially, I used to be a guy who hardly admires ladies, no matter how bonny they looked. But, it appeared as though I was necromanced, as the story changed when I gained admission into high school. However, on my first and possibly second day in school, I was still my former self not until after the third day, when the story took a new turn as I met this beautiful Lady.

Khalisha

Khalisha was the most beautiful damsel I ever came in contact with back then in high school. Her beauty was beyond comparison— her looks and complexion, her gait and attitude, her desert skin colour which brought out the perfection in her, also, her piercing eyes gave colour to life. There was no single night I wouldn’t think about this girl and wished she could be mine. But, the sad part of the story was that I never had the guts to confront her and express my feelings for her.

We weren’t opportune to be in the same class. But, on most occasions, we had combined classes for general subjects. Oftentimes, this brought her from her Science class and me from my Art class to the lesson venue. Consequently, this allowed us to at least get a little closer—aside from the leisure time during the break— it further gave me the chance to watch her very closely and realize that she also liked me. But instead of utilizing this opportunity and professing my feelings to her, I was held back by coyness.

Generally, it’s an unwritten fact that girls like brilliant guys, so I decided to work super hard academically. This catapulted me to the position of a senior prefect, I also saw myself representing the school on most occasions and had the chance of winning several medals and trophies. However, most people outside the box of my mind would think it was the love for my studies or my school that had motivated me thus far. But, unknowing to them, it was the love for a lady who couldn’t read the handwriting on the wall—a heart was beating for her—Hmmmm!!!

Furthermore, I knew she was impressed by my academic strides, which made her accord me more respect and attention. She wouldn’t trade sitting by my side during class sections, not even for the valuable things that could be thought of. I saw her beside me always, wanting to share every conversation she had with me, not minding if it were personal issues. Unfortunately, there was no courage to follow what my heart was telling me to do, which was ‘go for her, speak to her’.

Inadvertently, the story took a u-turn on a particular Monday morning. I was well dressed in my lovely starched, well-ironed,  light-yellow-long-sleeve shirt and black trousers, and perfecting the whole dressing with black sneakers. After the morning devotion, we all matched to our various classes. Afterwards, the first class that day was a combined class, which meant all the three classes (Art, Science, and Commercial) were to assemble in a single hall for the day’s lesson.

However, on that particular day, I got to the class late, and on getting there, the whole seat had been occupied. So, I decided to fetch myself a seat in a nearby class; which was science owned. On entering the class something happened, guess what?  I bumped into Khalisha. But, it was too late, as we both were of the same height, her lips moisturized on mine. I thought it was by mistake, waiting for her to retire her lips. Ironically, she lingered on, spreading warmth on every single part of my body. Then I felt it; butterflies flapped around my stomach frantically, and my mind began to swim.

Sincerely, It was so pleasing, so wonderful, It gave me boundless joy. To my greatest surprise, after she finally called off the kiss, she smiled. This showed that she had longed for this to happen. As mesmeric as her smile was, I couldn’t but return mine and also seized the opportunity to profess my likeness for her, guess what she said,  “I like you more” I was so short of words.

Initially, I was meant to fetch a seat and hasten back to the lesson room. Instead, I forgot my mission when my wish was becoming a reality. Progressively, I started clenching my hands in hers, it was pellucid for me to have noticed the burst of glee when I looked right through her eyes balls, at the same time barrelling words—expressing all the feelings I had nursed secretly for her for three years without her knowledge.

Unfortunately, it was too late, as it was a few weeks before our external exam. So, no time to move the love story to another level, I was very mad at myself for failing to have made ‘hay when the sun shines. Two weeks after the lovely kiss, she travelled to where she intended to write her exam. That was how I lost my first Juliet.

Habibah

Well, one would think this would sound like a lesson and warning for me that whenever I want something, I should stand up and go for it before the time runs out. I realized I didn’t learn my lesson when I met Habibah. I met Aliyu Habibah on the 27th of August 2018, at the CBT centre for the post UTME exam in  ABU Zaria.

Her garment alone made me wonder if an angel had descended from heaven—such a beautiful and expensive garment. But, I didn’t know that was just the tip of the iceberg until I got closer to where she was standing—this made me conclude the saying that  ‘the beautiful ones are not yet born’ was a terrible mistake because I found a beautiful one.

Afterwards, I thought I was only meant to admire her and praise heaven for the job well done on someone’s daughter and nothing more. Luckily, I saw her next to me on the same seat waiting to start the exam together. While we were waiting for the permission to start, I can’t even remember how we both got into conversation. Within a few hours of waiting, because of network issues, I had got to know a lot about this lady in question. 

She wouldn’t stop dishing me things I needed to know about her, both the ones I asked and the ones I didn’t ask about. I supposed she doesn’t want the conversation to end just like that, hence, she wouldn’t stop asking me some things about myself, which I was also no doubt excited to share, and I could see her grinning from ear to ear.

A few minutes before we rounded off the exam, something I never expected happened, which left my heart racing fast— whenever I remembered it always spread warmth on every part of my joints, even till this moment. I don’t know what came over her when I suddenly realized that she had her hand clenched so tight to mine. But when I looked up to see what was happening, she had her eyes looking into the oceans of mine, moisturizing her lower lip with her tongue which was communicating something that wasn’t hard for me to decode.

Although I pretended I didn’t get the message right— It wouldn’t stop saying ‘kiss me. Certainly, she believed I was going to comply because we were at the back seat of the exam hall, and it could have been so easy to give in to her request. Instead, I smiled sheepishly then flinched back to my monitor’s screen.

After the exam, when everyone was retreating from the hall,  we walked side by side with each other, gisting and laughing until she spotted the car which was sent to pick her up, not far from where we were standing. She told me that she needed to go, but from her facial expression, she was waiting for me to ask for something, which was why I think she delayed a bit before she could leave—that was her contact number. But stupidly enough, I never asked till she finally bade me goodbye and left.

However, it was when she had left, that the thought of switching numbers came to my head. Too late as my dream of having another Juliet shattered. Painfully, it took a long time before I was able to let go of those scenarios because her image wouldn’t stop coming to my head. Yeah! I know, I fucked up big time again. Ever since that day, I vowed not to allow such a golden opportunity to slip off my fingers again. Unfortunately, that was a wish without an action to back it.

Raihana

The night of December 7, 2021, was the day I knew I hadn’t learned from my previous mistakes. Just when I thought I broke the record of expressing my feelings to an intimate friend of mine for the first time. Prior to this, I met Rihanna on the 8th of January 2019 through Shegun, a friend of mine, at the Kotangora Square at ABU Zaria.  When we were asked to present ourselves (Newly admitted students) for screening and collection of the admission letter. Though we got along with each other as friends and coursemates, to a point, fellow compatriots in the department started smelling a rat between us. But the truth of the thesis was;  there was no chemistry between us.

As funny as it might sound, I realized history was repeating itself when I started developing feelings at its zenith for this lady, but wouldn’t say it to her.  Even though, I knew that the outcome would be fruitful if I had asked her out because she was so much into me as at then. This made Abdulsalam, a friend of mine who saw how close we were at first thought we were lovers. Afterwhich, he realized that the only two things binding us together were the rope of friendship and the fact that we were course mates.

Furthermore, he called me one faithful day and advised me to ask this lady in question out. He also said something which still lingers in my head;  he said “guy, you will regret it if you lose this girl to another guy”, instead of acting on that, I took it with a pinch of salt. The fact that I didn’t act fast on this doesn’t mean I was still the naive dude I used to be, but I was only taking my time to ensure we were deemed fit to mesh together.

Unfortunately, when I was certain we would make a perfect match for each other, having seen some qualities in her, I decided to shoot my shot. Immediately, I knew my shot was not worth shooting because it was already late. I didn’t know it was late not until a night in December—this was the time when the school was through with its section and everyone had left for their respective destinations.

Fortunately, I didn’t travel, nor did Rihanna. Hence, I decided to utilize the opportunity to ask her out to have some walks and pick up some snacks together, to which she agreed. On that night, it was one of the best hangouts I ever had in my life under the cold weather of Zaria, walking side by side with the one I was about to pour my mind out to, as regards the unconditional love I have nursed for her.

However, as sweet and lovely as the night went, I was plunged into emotional chaos turning my cheerful face into a saturnine one. I summoned courage and let the cat out of the bat, but was kissed with a ‘sorry it won’t be possible’ by Rihanna.

Though she appreciated the love and care but said she had already gotten a boyfriend that she was obsessed with, and wouldn’t want to cheat on him. On hearing this, I felt a big jab hitting deep into my heart spreading a great dollop of pain, punishing every single part of my body. For some moment, I was dumbfounded,  even though I wanted to say something I wasn’t sure because I was cheated by words.

Nevertheless, when I was able to put together my broken parts to finally talk, knowing that no matter how I tried, she had made up her mind—I said to her “in case the slot is opened again”. What I meant by “if the slot is opened again” wasn’t clear to me either, but deep down within me,  I knew it meant something strong which I was ready to wait for if her responses were to be positive. She made me realize how much she loved this guy and never prayed for a slot to be opened. Sadly, I knew I had lost, fallen, and lost big time once more.

Finally…

Though I knew there were nothing tears could do to make Rihanna mine, I had to ease myself of the pain which targeted the soul instead of the body and hit hard in the heart. This honestly has taught me not only to go for what I wanted but pulled me by the ear and spoke through it that ”A Stitch In Time Saves Nine”. How I wish I could turn back the hands of the clock to go back to the past and correct my mistakes.

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