There are various ways how to get people to like you, especially if you are not the outspoken or people-person type.
The truth is, that people are naturally drawn to others with likable characters or characters they wish to emulate.
Fun game, make a list of your friends and compare it to the list of traits I am about to show you. I bet you’d find one or more of these traits in them.
Let’s dive right in and find out 10 ways how to get people to like you.
10 Ways to Get People to Like You
1. Grow a Good Sense of Humour
I am deliberating putting this at the top of the list.
One tip on how to get people to like you is to have a good sense of humour. Now, I’m not saying you have to be a comedian or a circus clown to be likable. No!
It is in spotting the fun about a statement or an action that makes it funny. Be cool enough to spot the joke in something and laugh. Laughter is contagious.
You can be the reason people laugh because of a simple wordplay or trick. The goal is to make people find amusement by being with you.
A good laugh brightens up people’s moods. Life’s hard. Don’t be a source of boredom.
Pro tip- One of the traits a girl likes in a man is his sense of humor.
2. Be a Valuable Person
A person who has value to offer would generally be in everyone’s good books.
The big question here is, what value do you offer?
I had a tete-a-tete with a group of friends discussing what value means to them and someone gave an example. He said,
“If you want to cut your hair, you go to the barber. If you want to fix your car, you go to the mechanic. Everyone has a unique value they offer that is not necessarily tied to money”. And I felt that.
You could be a good listener or a very knowledgeable person and this could be the reason people want to be around you.
Find what value you have and cultivate it.
3. Be a Good Listener
Another tip on how to get people to like you is to be someone who listens.
I know we all love people who can spark up a room with their presence. There never seems to be a boring moment with them. Sometimes, though, all we need is someone who can sit and listen.
This is pretty true when you need someone to talk to, someone who would listen when you speak.
To be a good listener, you need to pay attention to who is talking, make facial expressions to show you are listening, and ask questions. These are simple traits you can build over time.
4. Compliment People
I believe that it’s just courtesy to see someone drip hard and compliment them, even if you don’t know them.
Someone once referred me to a gig all because I complimented their handwriting.
Complimenting people doesn’t just have to be about appearance. You can compliment them based on a noticeable feature you like about them.
“Hello, that was a nice speech you gave there. I totally love it”. Simple and short. And you are on your way to making a good relationship.
5. Keep a Smile on Your Face
” Have you seen the most beautiful of faces? It holds a smile in it” – Anonymous
If you are familiar with the Nigerian Twitter space, you’d know about an influencer called Onion Cider. Her face card never declines because she keeps a smiling face.
And that is one thing that endears people to her.
A smiling face is contagious, even if you are having a bad day. Keeping a smile on your face makes it easy for people to approach you.
6. Spend Time With People
A good way to get people to like you is by spending time with them. When you read this line, which of your friends came to your mind?
When you spend time with people, they get to see characters they like within you and vice versa. It also helps you build memories with them.
And we all love memories. It’s the reason why you take pictures, look back at them, and smile.
7. Be a Person of Positive Emotions
Another tip on how to get people to like you is to display positive emotions that people can relate to. If you can learn to see the good side of things, people would naturally want to be with you.
To constantly be positive, you need to learn how to control your emotions. You cannot always be happy or have a smile on your face.
But it is what you do when your emotions are tested that matters most!
I had finished writing an exam and the last question was after my life. After the papers, my circle gathered and it turned out, the last question was actually after all of our lives. In fact, it turned out, the last question was after the life of the whole class.
For the first time in my life, I feared carryover. I would have gone home gloomy if not for my circle. On the day when I couldn’t be the glue of the group, they all made me see the positive side.
As I write this, I am grinning because I am glad for my circle.
8. Have an Open Mind to Learn
Accept it, you do not know everything. It was Socrates that said, “I am the wisest man on earth because I know nothing”.
Keeping an open mind helps you learn new things daily. You do not act like you know everything, even if you do. And you do not let your thoughts stop you from seeing the perspective of others.
Be open to learning from anyone, even little children. This is why conversations that end up with both parties leaving bitter do not sit right with me.
Being able to learn from others is a trait that makes people always want to be around you.
9. Show People That You Truly Care
Think of it. Would you keep being friends with someone who has constantly shown they do not care about you? I doubt it.
Showing people you genuinely care about them makes them like you. A genuine show of care can be as little as checking up on them to know how they are doing.
Sometimes, it’s the little things that matter.
10. Talk to Them Often
I like my personal space a lot! I can spend the whole day indoors and not talk to anybody, online or offline. Just me, my laptop, and my phone. I learned the hard way, that is not the right way to live.
For people to even know you, you have to interact with them. And how the conversation goes would determine if they like you or not.
Keep in contact with your friends, and family often. Have a conversation with your professional network. These actions are pretty simple in this age of social media.
It is easy to be in everyone’s good book. If you practice these 10 tips on how to get people to like you, you are one step close to being a people person.
I’d also recommend Dale Carnegie’s book, “How to win friends and influence people”. I got most of my tips there.
Do you have any tips you’d like to work on or add? Drop your opinions in the comment section. I’d definitely be reading through.
How do I get people to respect you?
Setting boundaries, expressing confident body language, and standing up for your beliefs are some ways to get respect from people.
How do I get someone to like me over a text?
Some of the ways to get someone like you over a text includes complimenting them, playfully teasing them, and keeping your text simple, casual, and consistent.
How do I get someone to like me back?
If you like someone and you want them to like you back, you have to constantly be in contact with them, spend time with them, find out what they like, and get it for them.
How do I get people to talk to me?
To get people to talk to you, you have to keep an approachable personality and smile, and learn to keep a conversation going.
The rambles of traditional medicine sellers through loudspeakers is the hallmark of northern Nigerian markets. We buy a myriad of regimens to strengthen our physical health, but the noun ‘mental health’ sounds unfamiliar to our intellects, even though many people suffer from mental health conditions in northern Nigeria.
To the average northerner, the mentally ill are those communally neglected people that are left to roam the streets with rags, eating insects, worms, and whatever is within their reach in the garbage and dumping sites.
Well, you will no longer look at mental health from this angle after reading this post.
Are We Mentally Healthy?
Mental Health simply means emotional well-being, the ability of a person to cope with the normal stresses of life. Look at its positive side, and do what is beneficial to his/her immediate community.
Research has shown that one out of four people suffers from one mental health condition in northern Nigeria. This means, if there are 8 people in your family, 2 are mentally ill, one might ask: why don’t we see them eating sand or greeting the clouds? It’s because mental illness is wider than what we imagine it to be.
My question goes: are you always able to manage normal stress, see positivity, and do what is beneficial to others? We all are/might be patients at some point in life I suppose.
Time to Change Our Mindset
An average northerner does not count mental disorders among the major causes of physical ailments and morbidity. Also, an average northerner does not believe that western medicine can cure/manage mental disorder patients; hence, we associate mental illnesses with entirely different causes. Take a look at the following instances;
Children with attention deficit disorders who struggle with understanding concepts in school, yet we call them dullards
People with schizophrenia hear, see, and react to hallucinations, they relate to subjects that aren’t real. For that, we blame sorcery, witchcraft, or jinn possession
We believe people with amnesia (memory loss) and dementia (continuous loss of cognitive function) are caused by magical attacks from rivals.
Those suffering from social phobia who find it hard to relate with others and prefer staying in solitude are tagged as arrogant and masu-ji-ji-dakai. If they try socializing, they end up with anger issues due to anxiety disorders and we say they are jarababbu.
Someone afflicted by depression is tagged mai-ƙunci. After enduring and they decide to opt for suicide, they get judged by the community as someone that has no trust in Allah’s plan (maras tawakkali)
Whilst all the above boldly mental health conditions in northern Nigeria and many more could be prevented by family support or managed by doctors, out of unawareness and negligence, we subject the patients to stigma and inhumane treatments.
How Do We Handle the Patients?
Most families regard it as an insult to have a mentally ill individual as their member; others imagine it to be a curse upon the lineage. For that, families and companions relate to the mentally ill in the following inhumanely ways;
Turning deaf ears to the stress, and not giving a damn about the emotional stability of fellows
Restriction of amnesia and dementia patients from meeting friends and guests in a bid to conceal their situation
Chaining schizophreniacs with shackles to restrict movement and ensure the privy of their status
Taking panic attacks and epilepsy (not purely psychiatric) patients to traditional or religious rehabilitation centers, where they get whippings and incantations. A pity!
Giving food leftovers to the mentally ill, abandoning them to sleep on the streets with some even raped in the process.
The Good News Is…
When talking about physical health, we all know that some diseases are curable while others are manageable but none is invincible. The same applies to mental health, by consulting your primary care physician. You can be referred to a mental health specialist for proper treatment of your own or your loved ones’ mental disturbances.
The common signs of mental disorders include:
- Extreme anger and frustration
- Difficulty sleeping, sleeping excessively or other sleeping disorders.
- Excessive fear of events or imaginary situations
- Excessive eating or depressed appetite
- Inattention, depressed mood, and fatigue
- Alternating episodes of fanaticism and depression
- Restlessness for not taking a drug or drink
- Hearing, seeing, believing, or reacting to things or events that are not real.
When you have any of the above signs or notice any of them with a friend or family member, you shouldn’t delay consulting doctors for the condition to be curbed before getting worse. Just like malaria, mental illnesses are trials one should not be ashamed of suffering, seek out proper care. Please.
In addition, you should keep an eye on this space for subsequent posts about mental health awareness and improvements.
Remember; healthy mind, healthy life!
Knowing how to handle criticisms better is a valuable skill necessary for thriving in the workplace and society at large. We are humans and imperfections are a part of our DNA. We do not have the chance to always be perfect at what we do, hence, those who can see our flaws have the right to criticize and call us to check.
However, if you do not know how to handle criticisms better, you would have issues relating to people around you. Particularly because it is easier for others to see our flaws and give correction and people find it difficult to take or even learn from correction.
Types of Criticisms
Criticisms are opinions, judgments, or values someone has on a person’s work, actions or thoughts. It can be a positive or negative opinion and is usually aimed at pointing out flaws.
There are two types of criticism and you can identify them by how they are delivered- Constructive criticism and destructive criticism.
Constructive criticism is a good type of criticism aimed at pointing out your flaws and showing you how to work on them. Receiving constructive criticism can help you improve better if you work on it.
Destructive criticism, on the other hand, is a type of criticism that has no aim of improving a person. It is done without carefulness or consideration of a person’s feelings. Although it may have some truth in it, it would be difficult to act on it because the criticism comes with so much anger and hurt.
The difference between these two types of criticism is in the delivery. When criticizing someone, do it with understanding. My mum would say, “Correct a person the way you’d love to be corrected”.
Knowing that criticisms can come with so many emotions, here are 7 tips on how to handle criticisms better.
7 Tips on How to Handle Criticisms Better
1. Control Your Emotions When Receiving Criticisms
You are much less likely to learn from your mistakes if you react angrily to every correction you receive. And trust me, you’d receive corrections every day.
The first tip on how to handle criticisms better, is by knowing how to control your emotions. It is natural to want to react when you are being criticized but this method does not prove effective. Instead, it stops you from learning.
The more emotional we are, the more defensive we become.
The best emotion to show is no emotion. When you know you are building a defensive wall around your actions, take a deep breath and pause. It is a simple but effective way to cool down that immediate reaction building up.
If you know you are not in the state of mind to respond appropriately, ask if the conversation can be had another time and give your reasons why politely.
2. Learn to Listen Attentively
Attentive listening involves paying attention to what is being said and giving your speaker nonverbal signs that you understand.
Receiving criticism can be very uncomfortable and our natural technique is to withdraw and act nonchalantly or even dismiss the correction.
Once I was cooking at home when my sister told me not to take a certain action until she told me to. I did not listen because, first, I am older than her and secondly, I had years of experience in cooking compared to her. Let’s just say, when I was done, I wished I had listened to her.
When you’re being criticized, learn to listen objectively. This means, paying attention to the corrections with an open mind without jumping to conclusions immediately. Listening to corrections gives you a view of your actions from another angle different from yours.
As Dale Carnegie said in his book, “How to Win Friends and Influence People”-
“Any fool can criticize, condemn, and complain but it takes character and self-control to be understanding and forgiving.”Dale Carnegie
3. Focus on the Suggestions and Not the Tone
And we have come to the hard part of criticism – the delivery.
See, I need you to understand this – people are very different. How I would take or interpret your words or actions will be different from how another person would. Again, how your parents will correct you will be different from how your boss in the office would.
Do not think or expect everyone would criticize with a friendly tone.
Some people may have valuable suggestions that can help you improve but their tone and manner of approach may affect how you receive them. In situations like this, pay attention to the message, not the messenger.
Subsequently, you can approach the person and appreciate their feedback while politely letting them know how you felt about their manner of approach.
4. Avoid Taking Criticisms Personal
I don’t know if you’ve noticed but people hate to be corrected and when you correct them, they tend to take it as an attack.
As much as you hate being criticized, you also dish out criticism to others. Shocked?
Alright, check this. Has someone done something or said something and you felt it was wrong and you pointed it out to the person?
How you view criticisms will determine how you handle criticisms better. When you understand that constructive criticisms are meant to point out our mistakes, you’d learn to appreciate them more.
5. Always Ask Questions From the Feedback
A good way of checking how helpful a criticism will be is by asking questions from whoever is giving out the feedback.
Not all criticisms are valuable. Some are given out of a place of anger and hate. These are destructive criticism and they usually have no solutions on how you can work better on them.
A good way to work on criticisms is by asking questions on how best to work on the flaws being identified. Especially when the corrections are coming from people you trust and have a good relationship with.
I was to work on a group project with a few course mates and we planned on working on a presentation. During practice, I was always interjecting my mates and interrupting their speech. A close friend of mine within the group called me aside and told me the negative effect of my actions and gave me tips to work on them.
Subsequently, I had to learn how to let them speak without interrupting them with corrections. Only after their full speech did the group point out where they needed to work on and improve. The presentation was a success!
The purpose of criticism should be so you can improve.
6. Receive Criticism With Humility
One good way of how to handle criticism better is by being open to corrections irrespective of your age, status, or position.
Did I just shake a table?
It is easier to receive criticism from people above us but what happens when the suggestions are coming from those, we consider junior.
You see, the Nigerian “do you know who I am” attitude has blocked us from being open to correction. And, you don’t need to be on the third mainland bridge to exhibit it.
Every time you belittle suggestions from people you feel are inferior to you in age, status, position, or class, you are saying “do you know who I am. Why should I listen to you?” Just as how I refused to listen to my sister when I was cooking.
Be open to corrections from everyone. We do not always know it all.
7. Resist the Urge to Criticize Back
Coined from the popular saying “resist the urge to shalaye”, resisting the urge to criticize back is a better way to handle criticisms.
When you are being corrected and you realize that the flaw isn’t from you but the person criticizing, it is always best to avoid criticizing back, immediately. That would only add fuel to the burning fiery emotions.
Instead, nod in the affirmation that the criticism has been well received and give your feedback later when emotions are not misfiring.
Also, when receiving criticism, that is not a time to also remember the flaws of the person. Responding to criticism with another criticism has proven to be a very bad move.
In this article, I have shared 7 tips on how to handle criticisms better. The real effect is not just in reading but putting these tips to practice.
Criticisms are part of our daily interactions. We can be better at handling them by keeping an open mind, controlling our emotions, and paying attention to suggestions.
What tip do you wish to work on? Let me know by dropping a comment in the comment section. Personally, my favorite part has to be tip 6.
What are criticisms?
Criticisms are opinions or judgments we have of the actions, behaviors, or thoughts of others.
Is criticism bad?
There is nothing wrong with receiving criticisms. They help us know our flaws and prove that we can work to be better every day.
How to respond to criticisms?
The best ways to respond to criticisms are by remaining calm, paying attention to what is being said, and asking questions on how to improve.
What are the types of criticisms?
There are two types of criticisms. Constructive criticism is given with the aim of correction and improvement while destructive criticism is done without regard for a person’s feelings.
How do I criticize someone?
When criticizing, understand that the person has feelings too. Give corrections just as how you would love to be corrected. This involves appreciating a person’s effort, giving out the corrections, and ending with an appreciation again.
It was a cold Tuesday evening and I was having a chitchat with my sister. One thing led to another and we began to talk about some of the things girls look for in a guy.
At the end of our discussion, it dawned on me that many guys have a notion of what they need to do to attract a girl but do not have the faintest idea about the things girls look for in a guy.
To begin with, most women have specs and standards. My crush liked tall light-skinned guys and I automatically did not make that list. However, if you’re working out to impress your crush and you’ve tried all you can but it’s not working, this piece is for you.
After discussing with my sister, I decided to take the question to my female friends, and boy, I have a lot of things to share with you guys!
So let’s get down to business and find out things girls look for in a guy.
Things Girls Look for in a Guy
1. Your Appearance
This point cannot be stressed enough. I mean, out of the responses I got, girls seem to be very particular about a guy’s appearance. It is the first thing they notice about us, guys!
Appearance refers to how presentable you are. As the saying goes, dress the way you want to be addressed. The first impression a girl gets from a guy is his appearance.
To be clear, you do not need to be all suit and tie, James Bond 007, to make a good impression. The idea is, whatever you’re wearing should be neat and presentable.
Your personal hygiene also falls under this category. It’s not just okay to look nice, you also have to smell like you look. You can’t be looking all prepped up and smell like you need a bath.
How you appear says a whole lot about you. If you do not care about your appearance, it probably means you do not care about a lot of things too.
On a lighter note, I have a personal beef with guys who have beards and leave it unkempt. Do you know the treasures you have on your face that you are not making use of?
Overall, your appearance is one thing girls look for in a guy. A girl wants to be proud of her man, rather than embarrassed.
2. Girls Love Smart Guys
If there is anything that attracts girls to a guy, it how smart a guy is. Fun fact, all the girls I asked described smart guys as sexy. Girls are easily attracted to smart guys because it is one thing girls look for in a guy.
Smart guys are well aware of the happenings around their environment. They are very good conversationalists and can lighten up a girl’s mood with their wittiness. How do girls know if a guy is smart?
A few of the girls described a smart guy as one who’s sound academically. A smart guy can speak fluently and contribute intellectually to discussions and arguments.
A smart guy is also good at building conversations. If a girl is heavily attracted to you, she would want to talk about a lot of things with you. If you cannot contribute to making the conversation mutual, you’re slowly losing your grip.
Once I got tired of greeting my women “good morning” and I decided to greet them in a different language for one full week. It helped me learn about the cultures of these languages and I was able to strike a conversation with a girl on the Japanese anime culture. She used the word “scholar” to refer me to her fellow anime disciples.
3. A Girl Looks For Confidence in a Man
Oh, dear! You need to see the girls emphasize this attribute a lot.
One of the things I look for in a guy is how confident he is. I want a man who behaves like a man. I want a man who knows what he is capable of and can act when is needed.
To be clear, a confident man is not an arrogant, 6ft, muscular, bearded man who is always ready to start a fight in a restaurant at 6 pm. That right there is the opposite of a confident man.
A confident man is a man who knows his abilities, can be assertive, and understand Ms when to take action. Girls want guys who can stand in public and defend them. A man who knows how to take decisions seriously and fix things when they go wrong.
Might I also add, that being a gentleman is an added plus? Little things like walking her to the door, texting her to make sure she’s home safe, speaks of healthy masculinity.
4. Sense of Humour
This is a very special trait in a man. Nobody likes boring people. A little bit of humour can never be harmful in conversations.
Having a good sense of humour is one thing girls look for in a guy. You do not have to be a stand-up comedian to be attractive to a girl. Girls can easily detect how funny you are through your conversations.
Here’s the deal. The moment you make a girl laugh, you are very much getting her attention and laying the foundation for a possible relationship.
For me, it has always been a registered trademark – I tell the most boring jokes that make people laugh, ironically. In fact, my friends call me, Alex The Boring because my jokes make you stop, think and then, laugh.
I’m like Dwayne Johnson in Jungle Cruise where he said:
“Alright, listen up. I get paid by the number of people I take out, not by the number of people I bring back.”
Know this and know peace. Girls find funny guys very attractive. Next time you’re having a conversation, add a little bit of humour or wittiness to your speech. It always works.
5. A Respected Man
As a guy, the kind of company you keep says a lot about you. It is only natural that the people around you are people who respect you and you respect in return.
When one of the girls brought up the issue of respect, I believed that the amount of respect a man receives is tied to his net worth. However, the girls believed that 9 out of 10, are more concerned about how well-behaved a guy is.
A mannered and cultured guy is one thing girls look for in a guy. Your character says a lot about you as a guy and it’s one of the ways to make a respectable impression of yourself.
A well-behaved man naturally attracts respect. It’s simple logic – treat people how you wish to be treated. How you treat others determines how they’d treat you. If you respect others, you’d be respected.
Red flags such as the use of slur words, negative aggression, and nonchalant attitude are a few barriers to building a respectable reputation. As a guy, knowing how to control your emotions makes you inevitably attractive.
As a sharp guy and your one and only relationship hack plug, it hit me that most guys do not really have an idea what girls look for in a guy.
Some of the things girls look for in a guy include appearance- it’s the first impression she’s getting of you, how well versed are you in speaking, and your ability to build conversations. And finally, I can’t stress this enough, have a good sense of humour. Don’t be a boring dude.
The ladies who wish to add to the list can let me know by commenting in the comments section. As for the guys, let me know about your experience using my relationship hack tips.
Unhappy adulthood is often a result of hurting childhood experiences. One of these hurting experiences is termed childhood emotional neglect. This form of neglect is done unintentionally for genuine reasons. Therefore, parents and caregivers may provide for a child’s basic needs and still neglect that child emotionally. However, in addition to its short-term effect comes unbearable scars of its long-term effects, that’s why many adults are still searching for how to overcome childhood emotional neglect mainly because the pain from childhood has refused to heal and is affecting another aspect of their lives most especially their relationship with their spouse and close associate.
What is Childhood Emotional Neglect?
Emotional neglect happens when parents and caregivers are uninterested or ignore a child’s emotional needs. What then are emotional needs? These are simply the feeling of being loved, knowing that someone cares about you, and is always there to encourage you even when you make mistakes.
Emotional neglect is made manifest whenever parents place high expectations on their kids, criticize them, or refuse to listen to them, or nag at them. Oftentimes, ignoring their sad looks, restricting their movement, or using insulting words while addressing them. Perhaps, not giving their kids support whenever they decide to pursue their discovered interest.
Unfortunately, as simple as it may appear it’s a parenting mistake that has destroyed the love bond between parents and their children.
What Are the Effects of Childhood Emotional Neglect?
Emotional neglect might not have physical effects like other forms of abuse such as physical abuse and sexual abuse. However, its internal effects are as detrimental as a physical effect. This includes:
- Numbing One’s feeling
- Perfectionist attitude
- Easily get discouraged
- Prone to negative self-talk and thoughts patterns
- Low self-esteem
- Having the feeling of rejection
- Reliving in the past
- Indifference towards other person’s feelings
- Sad countenance
- Poor self-discipline
- People pleasers
- Withdrawal from friends and family
- Having the feeling of shame and guilt
- Not trusting anyone.
- Poor communication
7 Ways You Can Overcome Childhood Emotional Neglect
1. To Overcome Emotional Neglect Forgive Those Who Caused You Pain
In order to learn how to overcome childhood emotional neglect, you would have to do things you promised never to do, like forgiving those who caused you pain in the past. However, You might think nobody understands how badly you were hurt either by your parents or caregiver but for your good you need to forgive them. Refusing to forgive hinders your healing process, worsen your condition, and fills your heart with negativity.
As a victim of emotional neglect, you need to realize that those who hurt you had good intentions for you but were carried out wrongly. Therefore, forgiving will bring relief and happiness to your soul.
2. Let Go Of Your Past
Oftentimes, people claim to have forgiven those who hurt them but somehow they are still caught in the web of reliving their past. They find it difficult to move on, they keep on reflecting on how their emotions were shattered in the past. However, no matter how difficult it seems to forget you certainly have to learn how to take your mind off it each time it arises.
It’s pivotal you realize that dwelling in the past hinders you from focusing on today’s activities and enjoying the beauty that comes from them. Therefore, become committed to whatever you are doing at the moment, leaving no room for flashbacks on past experiences.
3. Self—acceptance Helps You Overcome Emotional Neglect
You might feel rejected and worthless as a result of being abandoned emotionally while growing up. However, what matters most is how you see yourself now. Unfortunately, the way you treat yourself is directly proportional to the way others will treat you. If you look down on yourself others will do the same.
Similarly, if you don’t believe in yourself or say negative words about yourself, that’s exactly what others will do. Therefore, irrespective of what you’ve been through, accept, value, and love yourself for there is plenty of room for positive growth.
4. Learn How to Recognize and Control Your Emotions
Those who are victims of childhood emotional neglect are prone to exhibiting negative and destructive emotions. In contrast, you could always substitute those negative impulses with positive ones. In essence, whenever you feel angry about your past, instead of retaliating, give yourself space, take control and replace it with positive emotions. This will prevent you from hurting yourself or others around you.
However, the best way to derive positive emotions is by setting your mind on those things which make you happy. This includes your interest, an adventure you did in the past, a scene from a movie, or past awards and accolades among others. In addition, positive emotions enhance emotional intelligence.
5. To Overcome Emotional Neglect, Choose Your Friends Wisely
Despite how shattered your emotions may be, you could still learn how to overcome childhood emotional neglect by carefully selecting those you associate with. Those you call your friend can make your life better or worse through their words and actions. Perhaps, you still surround yourself with discouraging friends, those who make you feel less of yourself and criticize your big goal, you need to rethink and discard such friends. This is because they will continually tear down your emotions.
In contrast, reselect those you associate with. Make friends with those that accept you for who you’re, encourage you, and bring out the best in you.
This set of friends will help you live above your childhood emotional neglect and have a happy life.
6. To Trash Out Emotional Neglect Become Active
As you learn more on how to overcome childhood emotional neglect, avoid staying ideal, as it makes you vulnerable to self-pity as a result of what you suffered during your childhood days. Therefore, to move to a better life, get involved in doing them worthwhile. This may require you to get a job, learn a skill, engage in your hobbies, or go on adventures with positive friends.
The goal of this is to take your mind off your past hurts and make you see thousands of reasons to live life the good way. Furthermore, avoid being alone for days without reaching out to anyone. That’s why you need positive friends with whom you can share your daily struggles and achievements.
7. Undergo A Therapy Class
Perhaps, you’re still struggling at overcoming childhood emotional neglect then it’s about time you undergo therapy. Therapy classes are not just for the traumatized victim, but all forms of emotional issues. The work of the therapist is to help you heal faster from your past wounds by helping you fix your mind on the present—a form of meditation.
Furthermore, provide you with tips to relate with others better like teaching you the 7C’s of communication. In addition, a therapist is also that listening ear to whom you can pour out your heartfelt pains at any time. I assure you of healing after undergoing a therapy session.
It’s detrimental if you attempt to overcome emotional neglect by doing the same thing that caused you pain to others, especially to your spouse or kids. The essence of you learning how to overcome childhood emotional neglect goes beyond healing yourself but that you also help others overcome and make the world a better place with healthy relationships.
If the tips provided here were helpful, then feel free to share your thoughts in the comment section below.