by JB Mairubutu | Nov 6, 2021 | Relationships & Weddings
One thing we shouldn’t joke with is our mental health and this is why it is important to date right. Dating for all the wrong reasons would bring heartaches and premium tears. So many who have gone down this route have either died or disliked the idea of being in love. It is, therefore, important that we date the right person. This article seeks to help you know how to find the right partner.
10 Ways of Choosing the Right Partner
1. Don’t Rush
We shouldn’t want to date just for fun or to catch the cruise. This isn’t healthy or morally right at all. For this reason, one isn’t supposed to rush into a relationship. I understand that there is an adrenaline rush when we meet someone new and seem to connect and we just wanna dive into a relationship with that person. No! Fight the temptation.
It might not be easy but it is important to observe and use one’s head before dating someone. If you do this, there is a 100 and 1 % chance that you will end up with the right partner.
2. To Find the Right Person, Don’t Let Lust Lead You
The fact that you have chemistry with this person and perhaps, you’re compatible sexually doesn’t make that person the right partner. Don’t allow sexual fantasies or lust to lead you.
If you allow lust to lead you, it is obvious that you will end up with the wrong person.
3. Find Someone You Can Be Free With
One way you would know if someone is right is if you find someone you can be yourself with. Anyone who wants you to pretend or live a fake life isn’t for you. You need to be free around your partner.
You don’t need a partner that always makes you feel bad about yourself. Nah! This is surely one of the ways to find the right partner.
4. To Find the Right Person, Avoid Materialistic People
If you are into materialistic people, this point is not for you. Materialistic people tend to be very entitled. These traits are that of toxic folks. Don’t go after people who are like this. They might ruin you big time. All they care about is buying the latest shoes, bags, shirts, and always looking at competing with others.
Flee from them!
5. Build True Friendship
Looking for how to find the right partner? Build true friendship and be intentional about this. I know a couple who have been married for close to ten years and they are happy. Guess what? They started this way – by building true friendship.
If you ask them what the secret to their happy home is, they will point to this fact. They are very good friends before being lovers.
6. Learn to Love Yourself
For you to find the right partner you can love or be with, you need to love yourself. This is very paramount. It is easier to love someone when you love yourself. Please, learn to love yourself.
7. To Find the Right Partner, Be Intentional About It
Being intentional about finding the right partner will help you put a lot of factors into consideration. For instance, the qualities you want in a person, the person’s interest, the type of family, etc.
Be intentional about these things. This will help you to settle for the right person.
8. Find Someone You Can Communicate Effectively With
This is very vital. The success of a relationship is dependent on communication. I want to share a story with you:
This couple were married, let’s say two months and the wife will cook and expect the husband to come dish for himself. She didn’t see serving him as a big deal. Don’t call her names yet, perhaps, in her home, everyone was expected to go dish food themselves. It happens. Hubby didn’t like this and it kept happening for weeks. It was beginning to affect their marriage until he realized that there was a need to talk to her about it. They did and it was then he realized that she didn’t even see not serving him as a big deal. After then, she changed and the problem was solved.
Do you see how powerful communication can be? If you’re wanna end up with the right person, let it be someone you have good communication with.
9. You Must Be the Right Person Too
Looking for how to find the right partner? Be the right person first. So many people want to date the right partner and on the other hand, they aren’t the right people themselves.
For you to be the right person, you will have to curb those excesses, work on bad habits, and be humane. If you do this, then you’re worthy to look for the right person to be with.
10. Avoid Negative-Minded Folks
You see people that are full-blown pessimists, avoid them. All they do is complain and always look for negatives in situations to talk about. You will be unfair to yourself if you end up with them.
They would drain the positivity out of you and you would end up miserable. As time goes on, they might start making you feel less of yourself.
Conclusion
Going through these points and how to find the right partner wouldn’t be a puzzle to you anymore. I hope you enjoyed your read. If you do, kindly leave a comment in the comments section. Thank you.
Always visit this blog for engaging reads. Ciao!!
You could also read on: 10 Things You Must Do at the Start of Every Relationship
by Abu Hafsah | Jul 4, 2021 | Personal Growth
Have you hurt someone and you’ve done things to get them to forgive you but they haven’t? Worry no more as I’m here for you. There are different practical ways on how to get someone to forgive you when you hurt or upset them.
We are all humans and so, we are bound to make mistakes, and there can’t be forgiveness without mistakes occurring first. Sometimes, they may be intentional because of a sudden outburst of anger from you on someone. Notwithstanding, just for you, I have compiled a list of things to do or say to get them to forgive you without even knowing they have.
Ways to Get Someone to Forgive You
1. Acknowledge You Have Hurt Them
There won’t be a need for anyone to forgive you if you haven’t offended them in the first place. It is necessary to know the reason why they are hurt. Figure that out and try to see you never repeat such.
By just acknowledging to them that you have made them unhappy will give you a chance of having them forgive you. This is one of the important ways to get someone to forgive you. More so, don’t feel like a boss or let your ego get the best of you. As difficult as it may seem, acknowledge your mistakes and own up to them.
Don’t let them approach you about it first; the reverse should be the case.
2. Show Them You Regret Your Actions
Whatever it is that you may have done to them – be it a mistake or an intentional act that made them miserable, show them that you regret your actions. This is one of the surest ways to get them to forgive your shortcomings.
For instance, you make gest of him/her in public, they got angry and left. Stop immediately you notice their mood has switched from being normal to being upset. Follow them to wherever they are going to and show remorse towards what you’ve done.
Don’t wait for a later date; you’ll be screwing things up the more.
3. Show Them Lots of Care
This is where you up your game. The heart by nature usually likes the person who cares about it and repels those that don’t. Increase the love and care you have for them. Get them to notice your effort by making it very obvious. Begin to watch that football match of his favourite team together, begin to compliment her beauty more often than usual, appreciate every little effort they make from making up, keeping the house tidy, fending for the family, and so on.
Go out of your way to do things to please them. It’s only a matter of time before you are forgiven. Trust me.
4. How to Get Someone to Forgive You? Send Them Gifts
Gifts have a special way of making the recipient feel loved and cared for. Time occasions that are very important to them, prepare gifts you know they like and attend the occasion if possible.
In addition, celebrate each and every success in their lives with gifts from you – like promotion in the workplace, securing an appointment, getting selected to attend a programme they’ve always wanted their whole life.
Are you still thinking ‘I’m forgiven?’ You are forgiven.
Looking for a gift to give them, check: 44 Gift Ideas for Him and Her
5. Tell Them You Are Sorry
If they fail to understand how sorry you are for your actions or gestures, choose the right time, confront them and just tell them you are sorry, straight up, and show all sincerity about it. Drop that ego, it’s not going to help you if you really need to be forgiven.
Furthermore, ‘sorry’ has an amazing way of solving a very huge disagreement. If you’re that kind of person whom the ‘sorry’ seems to be heavy in your mouth, try it and feel its power.
6. Explain Honestly the Reason for Your Action
Sometimes, misunderstandings could cause a fight; neither you nor they are at fault.
Let’s take, for instance, you cooked a meal for your husband – who doesn’t like spicy meals, and prepared a table for him. During the preparation of the meal, you searched for pepper in the presence of your daughter who was in the kitchen with you but couldn’t find it. You asked your daughter to go get some for you in the shop in front of your house. You later found it and added it to the soup. Unknown to your daughter, she added more on her return.
Your husband arrives, took the meal, and starting complaining, shouting at the top of his voice. Don’t react negatively, explain to him what happened and I bet you, he will forgive you.
Let’s take another instance where your girlfriend is expecting an ASAP reply to a message she sent you; you replied to her immediately but unfortunately, the network didn’t deliver it. She got angry and refused to call you. You later realized why she was upset with you. Don’t be mad, understand the situation from her own side. What you need to do is explain to her what had happened and show her proof of your innocence. They will forgive you even though you did nothing wrong.
7. Try As Much As Possible Never to Repeat the Same Mistake Again
Mistakes are actions or statements we make that are incorrect or unintentional. It’s allowed for one to make mistakes if they are minimal, but when they are no longer mistakes when they become habitual.
You need to know what you have done and try not to repeat it to the best of your ability. Nobody will take you seriously when you keep repeating the same mistake over and over again.
8. Prepare a Delicious Nice Meal
How to get someone to forgive you? Try cooking a delicious meal for them.
Like the saying goes “the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach”. That’s true, though, one of the ways. You already know that you have hurt him. Now all you need to do is tie that apron, get your equipment ready and prepare his favourite meal. While he’s eating, sit close to him – maybe on his lap, be caressing his head and touching him here and there while apologizing for your wrongdoing with a melodious voice. It’s as easy as that.
It may even shock you when he asks “Honey, what wrong did you do?”
It even works better when a guy does that to his partner. This is one of the reasons why all men should learn to cook.
There you have it, one of the ways to get someone to forgive you. Better learn how to be a better cook today.
9. Begin to Do Things They Have Always Wanted You To
Is there that something they have always wanted you to do and you are been reluctant about doing it – say, they prefer you putting on English wears to native attires, they want you to like something they want? This is the right time to do it or like it. Don’t hesitate, just do it. This will send them a message that you are sorry and that you want to be forgiven. If they still care about you, they will consider that.
Don’t stop there, continue to do those other things that you do for them too, you can improve on them for better results.
10. Ask Their Friends or Family to Extend Your Apology
They should have a friend or family member that they have so much respect for. Meet them; table your issue, not in a way of exposing their secrets. Ask them to extend your apology to him/her. You never can tell, it may turn out favourable.
11. How to Get Someone to Forgive You? Sex!
One of the ultimate measures or ways married couples tend to make up for wrongdoing between themselves is sex. There is a high proclivity of forgiveness through sex.
According to a study by Eric W. Dolan quoted from research published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, The researchers found higher levels of conflict resolution quality were associated with higher levels of sexual satisfaction.
In other words, couples who reported that they commonly could “come to an understanding” after a conflict tended to also agree with statements such as “Our sexual relationship is an important source of strength and connection in our relationship” Husbands who were more forgiving also tended to have higher levels of sexual satisfaction, as did husbands and wives who were less anxiously and avoidantly attached.
But it’s not advisable to always settle disputes in this manner. It will be better to find other ways of making things better between you two while still standing.
Conclusion
How to get someone to forgive you is easy if you know your ways. There are so many ways but I have compiled a list of some of them for you. Each and every way, assures a promising result. Give it a try and you will be glad you did.
Don’t forget to share with me in the comments section below how you successfully got someone to forgive you for wrongdoing.
If you find this article worthwhile, you could also read on: 13 Proven Ways to Make Someone Love You and 15 Ways You Can Tell They Like You.