This Is How You Make Your Marriage Work with Stepchildren

Written by Happiness Hassan

Happiness Hassan is a content writer, copy editor, and proofreader. She is an expert in creating SEO content that spans through a variety of niches, including business, career, productivity, Christianity, family, parenting, and many more. When not glued to the screen writing or researching, she can be seen listening to cool music or reading a self-development book.

September 16, 2021

In a real sense, not every single parent raising a child can remain single for the rest of their life after a separation from their ex-partner—either through death or divorce. There comes a time of longing for affection, a pressing desire to share the family burden with a listening ear most especially when raising a child with autism or planning and utilizing the family budget.

However, it becomes frustrating if your kids find it difficult to accept your newly found spouse irrespective of gender. Therefore, It’s wrong to ignore your kid’s feelings by going ahead with the relationship. In contrast, encourage your spouse to learn how to make a marriage work with stepchildren to achieve a happy home.

8 Ways To Make A Marriage Work With Stepchildren

1. Appear Friendly To Win Your Stepchildren Support

Kids are attracted to open-hearted and friendly personalities. In other words, they feel secure in their presence and trust such a person who is about to become their new dad or mom depending on the situation.

Therefore, whenever you are around your stepchildren, put on a welcoming smile, speak with a calm tone and tolerate all their wrongs until there is a significant increase in the love bond between you and them.

2. To Make A Marriage Work With Stepchildren Show Support In Their Interest

Perhaps your stepchildren have discovered their passion. It’s a perfect medium to leverage on and make them accept you. Everyone loves whoever supports and encourages their passion and wants the best for them.

This same principle applies to kids. Therefore, if you must learn how to make a marriage work with stepchildren you must be prepared to support their talent even if you don’t like it.

3. To Get Along With Stepchildren Assist Them In Certain Activities

To prove yourself worthy you must be ready to go the extra mile. This involves assisting them with anything they find challenging to carry like certain household chores for kids and helping with their school assignments—this enhances their academic performance.

Subsequently, they begin to find you supportive and look up to you for other things.

4. Avoid Imposing Your Will If You Need A Healthy Relationship With Stepchildren

Be reminded that you are new into their lives and it will take a lot of time and effort to make them see the real you. Hence, it’s not the time to begin imposing your will on them. Preferably give them suggestions and advice on the step they are about to take and allow them to make their own decisions for themselves.

Most importantly, avoid arguing with them to prove yourself right.

5. Bring Gifts Each Time You Go Visiting

How to make a marriage work with stepchildren entails appeasing them with gifts of all varieties. However, this must not be something too expensive or an everyday duty but regular.

In essence, it’s the heart that gives that matter and not the gift itself. Giving stepchildren gifts shows that you aren’t a stingy kind of person. Similarly, makes the children happy and always want to hang around with you.

6. Erase Anger And Negativity While Around Your Stepchildren

Despite how annoying your stepchildren may be, never lose control of your anger, it’s dangerous and can ruin your aim of being accepted as a parent.

Similarly, avoid using negative words while communicating with them, most especially when they fail at doing something right—being negative tears down their self-esteem and makes them hate you. Instead, encourage them to put in their best next time.

7. Take Them Out Together With Your Spouse

Don’t make the mistake of excluding your stepchildren when going on outings with your spouse, it sends a message that you care about them.

However, one of the fastest routes on how to make a marriage work with stepchildren is by hanging out with your spouse and his/her children. This single act portrays you as a responsible mom or dad.

8. To Make A Marriage Work Out With Stepchildren Show That You Love Your Spouse

Kids can give you a pass or a fail card by examining your love for their single parent. If you make your spouse happy indirectly the kids will be happy. Furthermore, always give your maximum support and understanding to your spouse.

Most importantly, listening attentively when they share their burden and provide solutions to their needs without time wastage.


Persistence is key when it comes to how to make a marriage work with stepchildren. Stepchildren can make your effort appear useless and make you want to give up. However, that’s when you should keep on trying to be optimistic about building a loving relationship with your stepchildren.

Don’t forget to share your comments below on the best possible ways to get along with stepchildren.


Can step kids destroy a marriage?

Yes. Oftentimes parents tend to value the opinion of their kids when choosing a new spouse. Therefore, there might be a problem in the marriage if your step child doesn’t welcome you.

What do I do when I don’t like my step children?

If truly you value the relationship and desire something lasting, you must learn to go beyond the harsh attitude of step children and do those things that ignite love for them. Sincerely, the more closer you get to know your step kids the greater the love will increase.

Is it normal not to love step children?

Yes. However, this is usually at the initial stage of the relationship, where you begin to feel as though step children are standing in the way of being with the one your heart beats for. Also, step children can really be annoying when they don’t like you.

What are those things i should never do to a step child?

There are quite a number of things you should never do, but the most important is that you should never come to that point where you show less concern about your step child. This attitude can get your spouse annoyed and assume you don’t really care about what matters to them, and gradually problems begin to creep into the relationship.

When to leave because of step children?

Perhaps, you’re contemplating divorce due to stepchildren’s interference, you must realize that step children aren’t a good enough reason for you to quit that relationship. This is because getting to love and accept someone new is often difficult for step children as they feel jealous about their parent giving attention to someone else. But, if your spouse decides not to continue with the marriage, you can think of getting a divorce if that’s what they want. Although that shouldn’t be your first option. 

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