by Happiness Hassan | Oct 23, 2021 | Relationships & Weddings
Marriage is supposed to be a happily ever after union as every couple pictured from the sunset. Unfortunately, they ignore the fact that life is an alternating period of ups and downs. Furthermore, conflict is inevitable in every relationship, especially marriage. Therefore, to avoid walking out of your marriage too soon, you should learn how to handle crisis in marriage. This enables you to see the light at the end of your marriage tunnel when things aren’t going as expected.
Crises in marriage are caused by numerous factors ranging from planning and utilizing family budget, selecting the right school for the kids, invasion of the third party, the individual preference, among others. However, this post will outline the steps on how to handle crises in marriage successfully.
Steps in Settling Crises in Marriage Amicably
Step 1: Identify the Root Cause of the Problem
Before providing solutions, comes clear identification of the root cause of the problem. This step is important because it helps you seek out direct solutions and preventive measures to avoid the recurrence of such crises in the future. Unfortunately, it requires maturity to state the main cause especially when you’re the one at fault. However, you must learn to choose the happiness of your marriage over your selfish pride.
Step 2: To Handle Crises in Marriage, Take Full Responsibility for Your Actions
Irrespective of who is at fault between you and your spouse, there is every need that you take responsibility for your actions. This is because crises occur in marriage when the two parties involved are on two opposite lanes. Hence, everyone thinks they are right. But, for you to learn how to handle a crisis in marriage, you have to be courageous enough to fix the problem instead of running away or transferring blame on your spouse.
Step 3: Engage in a Brief Retreat Period
Approaching your partner immediately after a crisis isn’t a good idea. Similarly, avoiding your partner for a long time isn’t advisable. What then is a retreat period? This is a short period of time in which you stay alone and think through what has happened before taking further decisions. The retreat period is an essential ingredient when learning how to handle crises in marriage.
Its advantages are numerous; it gives you the avenue to recognize and control your emotions – anger, regret, depression, and sadness. It also averts the transfer of negative emotions. Furthermore, it helps you think from an understandable position considering your partner’s views and emotions.
Step 4. Resolve Within You to Approach Your Spouse
Two wrongs don’t make a right. Hence, whenever there is a crisis at home, be courageous and be the first to seek peace. I understand how this stage might be difficult when you aren’t wrong. But then, a settled dispute is better than getting a divorce which has a grievous impact on the kids and between your family and your partner’s. You must realize that divorce always leads to emotional neglect and defaulted psychological coordination in kids.
In addition, avoid assumptions during a crisis. Instead, resolve within you to approach your partner, asking questions on the things you’re unsure about. This is surely one of the ways to handle crisis in marriage.
Step 5. To Amicably Settle Marriage Crises, Reconstruct Your Manner of Approach
The achievement of peace after a marriage crisis is solely influenced by your manners of approach. Meeting the above four criteria isn’t enough to handle the crises. Instead, you must carefully reconstruct how you approach your spouse. Avoid approaching your partner when they aren’t in a good mood, perhaps, tired, hungry, or angry.
Furthermore, you could as well speed up the process by creating a conducive atmosphere. For instance, surprise him/her by performing their supposed duty in the home, preparing their favourite dish, or by giving them gifts.
Step 6. Carefully Select Your Words Before Approaching Your Spouse
In addition to your manners, you need to critically select your words. Your word choice will influence the outcome of your quest for peace. Therefore, you must be able to communicate effectively. Most importantly, avoid those words that portray blame and guilt so also insulting and criticizing words. In contrast, go for words that show you really want a settlement and truly value your spouse. This kind of word enhances the love bond between you and your spouse and safeguards your marriage.
Step 7. Have a Heart-to-heart Discussion With Your Spouse
Having met the above-listed criteria, it’s time you sit and discuss what exactly happened with your partner. Afterward, delegate together the best way to avoid such crises in the future. This stage is divided into 4 units.
Always go straight to the point without beating around the bush. Being direct involves expressing yourself in the best possible way, so your partner can relate to your feelings.
After you have expressed your point of view, allow your partner to express theirs while you listen. It’s disrespectful to interrupt your partner while they express their emotions.
It doesn’t matter if you were right or wrong. All that matters is saving your marriage. Therefore, how to handle crisis in marriage requires you to tender apologies to your spouse. Besides, they may have felt hurt by your actions or words during the cause of the crisis.
Once your partner apologizes without even asking, you should be willing to forgive them and forget. Remember, this is the person you desire to spend your entire life with, so, there isn’t any need for grudges or holding onto past offenses.
Conclusion
In marriage, you certainly need to remain open-minded and willing to forgive even before a crisis arises. If truly you love your spouse, the application of the above steps on how to handle crises in marriage won’t be difficult to inculcate.
Perhaps, you can relate to the above steps. Do share how you were able to handle your marriage crises amicably. Thank you.
You could also read on: You Are Not a Good Parent if You Don’t Avoid These Parenting Mistakes.
by Aisha Zakari | Oct 16, 2021 | Relationships & Weddings
Planning a first date can be nerving, overwhelming, and awkward but most people pay attention to other things and rarely focus on things to say and things to not say on a first date. Dates are usually formal for the first time as people get to know each other better, look for the best location and select the perfect outfit.
In this post, I’ll be making a list of those words and sentences you shouldn’t utter on a date. Let’s talk.
1. Leave Your Business Out of It
You are a person of ambition and success doesn’t mean you have to put it all up in your date’s face talking about how much you’re worth or how many houses you own. By doing this, you come off to your date as being rude, impolite, boastful, and cocky; this just ruins the chance of a second date. There is a thin line between being confident and boastful so try to balance this and make it clear to your date in the politest way.
A tip I’ll give here is to make sure you’re not talking about yourself the entire time. Engage with your date, ask them about their dreams and aspirations, what they would like to be. Give them attention, a listening ear and with this, an interesting conversation ensues. Get to know them better, that’s why it’s a date.
2. Politics and Religion Are a Huge Turn-off
People are different and definitely have preferences, choices, and opinions but when it comes to me, things not to say on a first date are politics and/or religion.
As passionate and interesting politics may be for you, it may not be for the other party. As such, avoid mentioning this as a conversation on a first date. In a way, politics and religious topics tend to upset people because there will be room for heated debates and different opinions. This is a date to get to know each other not to know why the Buhari’s wedding souvenirs was what it was.
But if your date is into politics, oh my then ride on. It’s your date after all.
3. Do Not Bring Up Your Ex
I must confess, I’ve been here before, and believe me, I messed up things with someone. Took me a while to realize and admit but oh well. Talking about how Isah stood you up or how Hauwah cheated on you with your best friend is a major No. Leave negative Isah and Hauwah at home!
Bringing up your ex on the first date sends the wrong messages to your date. It sends:
- You’re still stuck and very much in love with them
- You are instantly a turn-off
- You’re a baggage
People don’t claim baggage in their life. I mean they want a happy relationship with someone that is not difficult or wishes her ex were still with them. Rather, focus on this person sitting in front of you, get to know them, explore new relationships. Past relationships could be talked about later in the future when you’ve created a strong bond and relationship with them.
4. “You look better in pictures”
Hold up, what’s that? That is completely unnecessary and should not be uttered to someone at all and definitely not a thing to say on a first date. For me, I believe when it comes to social media and posting, deciding on a picture to make public can be quite difficult and whatever a person posts, they believe that is their best.
What your date looks like offline and online shouldn’t be a topic of discussion even if you think they don’t look good. It’s either you point it out in a polite way or don’t tell them at all. Saying such words immediately kills their confidence and self-esteem. That is not how you want to go down this road with this new person you just met.
5. “I’m not looking for anything serious”
Sigh, were you asked? Zip that mouth already! Your date is not a hook-up or a one-night stand and neither are they cheap or wasting their time coming on this date with you. Saying such utterances is not a thing and should be off the record.
Yes, going on a date with someone means opening up to new exploration and ideas of relationships but not all the time. Dates could be harmless sometimes, you could end up being just friends with them and that’s okay.
6. Leave The Marriage Talk Out of It
There is no need to scare your date off with the plans you’ve had to have 3 kids named Hassana, Abdullahi, and Muhammad. Dates should be something fun and thrilling to do, not nerve-wracking and asking tricky questions such as:
- “Where do you see this relationship heading in 3years from now?” My dear, it’s not an interview!
- “Do you see me as wife material?”
It’s a date, have fun and get to know each other better. If anything will happen along the line, let it come naturally.
7. Put That Phone Down
This is my top list. When you’re on a date for the first time, your phone should be put away at all times. You’re on this date to talk, socialize, chat, get to know each other better, and have fun.
It is rude to even check your phone on a date unless it’s an emergency or something serious and your attention is needed. Remember, this person took the time out of their day for this date, make it count.
8. Own Up to Yourself
You don’t need to apologize for what you’re wearing or how you look or why a pimple popped out on your face this wonderful evening. However, your look and whatever you’re wearing, shouldn’t be a thing to worry about.
Words like that are things to not say on a first date as this tells them that you’re insecure and that you need reassurances to how you look. And this, my dear inevitably becomes a huge turn-off for them. You don’t need anyone’s validation to feel and look amazing.
Remember, first impressions always matter, and on dates, this tends to determine if you’ll be getting a second one or not. So, blow their minds away.
9. Past Sexual Experiences
This is a complete No on a first date. You do not ask your partner such and you definitely should not talk about your own sexual experiences. It is of no use to both of you at that particular place and time.
The sole aim of this date is to know each other. So, instead of talking about how you went three rounds, why not ask about your date’s dreams or what kind of pet he/she likes? Talk about something interesting and leave that out of the equation.
10. Keep the Attitude Away
It is believed that a way to know a person’s character is how they behave with people around them; for example, the waiter/waitress and staff at the date location. So, be on your best behaviour and be kind to people to impress your date. Remember, not only on a date night should this be done. Be kind always, let humanity live.
Conclusion
Now that you’ve read these things to not say on a first date, go ahead and lookup for the best location and the perfect outfit. Go on that date, have fun and give your date a fun-filled conversation they will not forget and will definitely ask for another.
I’ll be here in the comment section, tell me how that date goes.
by Precious Alex-Toji | Oct 16, 2021 | Relationships & Weddings
Have you ever wondered how to build healthy relationships? Are you like me, who after watching “The Sun is Also a Star”, wished for a relationship that was both mutual and healthy?
The good thing is, I found the recipe on how to build a healthy relationship. Being in a relationship can be an exciting experience, especially when it’s at its early stage. Your heart skips and you develop goosebumps at the sound of your partner’s voice. The real test comes when the relationship progresses.
As time goes on, you get to discover what you like and dislike about your partner. Conflicts arise and if this is not handled properly, it can build up to an unhealthy relationship. This article seeks to help you avoid that.
These 10 Tips Can Show You How to Build a Healthy Relationship
1. Being Respectful Can Encourage the Growth of a Healthy Relationship
A relationship where both partners have respect for one another is a recipe for building a healthy relationship. Naturally, it is courtesy to be respectful to people. Just because you’re familiar with your partner does not give you the chance to be rude. This is very obvious during arguments.
Arguments are parts of a relationship you can’t avoid. Dear, it comes with the package. Knowing that arguments are bound to happen can help you maintain decency during such a period. You can have an argument without necessarily fighting.
Watch what you say when you’re angry. Avoid cursing and calling each other names when having a fight. Some words cannot be taken back when said.
2. Listening to Each Other Can Help Build a Healthy Relationship
In this era of social media, trends, and news, it is so odd that so much is being said and little is being heard. While it is true that communication strengthens relationships, sometimes all your partner needs are your listening ears. So, be a good listener.
Your partner’s view may be opposite to yours. As tempting as it may feel to object, the logical action to take is to listen. The bright side of this is, you get to know the thoughts of your partner, while also serving as a safe space for them and preventing arguments.
3. Be Ready to Apologize When You’re at Fault
Being apologetic when you do something wrong helps build healthy relationships. Being able to say “sorry” when you’re wrong is a necessary skill for building a healthy relationship. Apologizing when at fault shows you understand that you’re wrong and you care about how your partner feels. It also helps you both sort out the issue as it occurs without letting negative feelings stay long.
While it may not be your intention to hurt your partner, apologizing shows you care about the relationship. Admitting your fault and taking steps to ensure such an issue does not reoccur builds transparency and trust.
4. Setting Boundaries in Your Relationship Can Build a Healthy Relationship
Boundaries are limits to what you can or cannot condone. Respecting each other’s set boundaries can help build a healthy relationship.
Setting boundaries allows you to connect with your partner without having to let go of your standards. Healthy relationships thrive when partners know and respect each other’s boundaries. For example, when it comes to sexual intimacy, setting boundaries can help your partner know what activities you’re comfortable with.
Learn the habit of setting boundaries as it allows you to grow into a relationship at your own pace and standards.
5. Effective Communication Is the Foundation to Building Healthy Relationships
A fundamental part of building a healthy relationship is learning how to effectively communicate with each other.
Good communication is a skill that requires learning and patience. It goes two ways: Effective Communication and Effective Listening. When good communication is established, you inevitably experience a positive emotional connection with your partner.
Here’s how you can communicate effectively:
- Never assume your partner knows your needs. It is your position to let them know how you feel.
- Make sure your message is clear, easy to understand, and courteous. Sometimes, the issue is not the message but how it is presented.
- Pay attention to your partner’s body language. Are they sad, hyperactive, or tired?
Take into consideration your partner’s emotions when communicating. If you’re not conscious of their emotions, you can unconsciously damage the connection between the both of you. Effective communication surely helps build healthy relationships.
6. Creating Time for Yourself Away from Your Partner
As strange as this might sound, you must create space for yourself outside your relationship.
While spending time with the one you love is essential, it is important that you also have time for yourself. Couples who spend time together without having time for themselves outside the relationship tend to “get used” to each other and eventually lose the craving they had from the onset.
If your partner wants to contact you at all times or expects that you account for all your actions outside of the relationship, this can come off as being too controlling or too dependent.
As a lady, have a fun time with your girls. Go out, have some non-alcoholic drinks, chase your goals. As a guy, play video games with your boys and watch that football match.
Being close with your partner is important. However, it is also important that closeness does not affect your life outside of the relationship.
7. Express Admiration and Appreciation for Each Other
We all love to be admired and appreciated. That little “You look gorgeous today” and “Thank you for this gift” always put a smile on our faces.
In a relationship, it is healthy for both partners to show appreciation to each other. When your partner goes out of the way for you, be inclined to express your thanks. Words like “Thank you”, “I’m grateful” and actions such as buying gifts, flowers, and surprises are ways to express appreciation.
According to research, one of the reasons long-term couples split up was that one of the partners no longer showed enough affection and attention as they used to. Do not get too familiar with your partner. When they look dead gorgeous, say it. Let them know what you think of their looks and bodies.
8. Intimacy in a Relationship Can Foster a Healthy Relationship
Intimacy helps build healthy relationships. The term intimacy has come to be associated with sex. While consensual sex may be part of being intimate, it’s not the only way of being intimate. Intimacy is the feeling of closeness or openness towards someone else, not necessarily involving sexuality.
Intimacy can be likened to the bond between a mother and child. At infancy, a child would always want to be near the mother. Simple things like hugs, touches, and even kisses matters to the child. As we grow up, these tendencies do not end with infancy.
As partners in a relationship, you both must get intimate with each other. When in public, hold hands together. Watch a movie together wrapped in a duvet while it rains. Frequently, dish out words of affection.
9. Resolving Conflicts Together Can Strengthen Your Relationship
Every human interaction is bound to have conflicts and this is perfectly okay. Both of you will have differences and mindsets and this can sometimes lead to conflicts. Rather than avoid conflicts, it is better to resolve them as they occur. Avoiding conflicts can lead to bottled-up feelings, stress, distancing, and inevitably break-up.
Conflicts are good. It strengthens the bond in a relationship because it helps identify the likes and dislikes of both partners. It becomes an issue when it occurs frequently and is left unresolved.
Communication is the best way to resolve conflicts. Remember that effective communication occurs when the message is clear, easy to understand by the receiver.
Talk with your partner to see their perspective of the issue and communicate your perspective too. Take into consideration your emotions and theirs and be patient. Try to reach an agreement that suits both of you.
10. Honesty Between Partners Builds a Healthy Relationship
This cannot be overemphasized enough! No relationship built on lies can survive the test of time.
When you talk to your partner about your day, do not hide details you feel. This would be an issue later on. They should hear it from you than from an outside source.
If something is bothering you, be open to express it with your partner. Sometimes, trying to hide details you feel might be irrelevant. When you do this, you not only hurt your partner but your honesty becomes questioned.
Conclusion
A healthy relationship is such an amazing experience. It, however, requires the effort of both partners involved.
Communication with each other can help build intimacy and connection. In the process of communicating, conflicts will arise. Resolve the conflict gently without flaring up or cursing; nothing good comes out of these anyways.
More so, create time to spend with each other, volunteer together, read together, and listen to music together. Actions like these build connections between partners.
If you have found your knight in shining armor or your Cinderella with her lost shoes, practice these tips on how to build healthy relationships and watch your relationship become #relationshipgoals.
Make some comments below in the comments section if you find this article helpful. Thank you.
by Abu Hafsah | Oct 10, 2021 | Personal Growth, Relationships & Weddings
Perhaps, you have been asked out by someone, proposed to by someone, invited to join a team, or someone is wanting to be friends with you. In life, you can’t escape situations like these. Now, do you wish to know how to turn down someone politely, and probably still be friends? If your answer is positive, then this post is for you.
Let me be your tour guide on how to reject that girl/boy nicely, how to turn down someone politely and how to reject any offer in general, politely.
9 Ways to Turn Down Someone Politely
1. Prepare Yourself to It
As easy as you may see it as do not think of confronting the person in question without actually making a plan on how you want everything to go about. “Failure to plan is planning to fail” phrase cannot be more right.
First, the approach you will use depends on the individual. Therefore, ensure you know the individual well. If you already do, then that’s fine. Now, think of what to say and the gestures you should use while saying it. Please, do not give a long speech, you may begin to sound unserious, childish, or boring if you do.
So, be as brief as possible except in a situation where they keep interrupting, only then should it be long. Even at that, try to break any conversation short – in a nice way the moment you sense it.
2. Be Honest about It
How to turn down someone politely can be achieved successfully if you’re honest about it. There is this special attraction people feel for honest people, even the dishonest ones. Ensure that whatever you say is true and nothing but the truth. Saying things that are false is the wrong way to go about turning down someone. This is because since they already know you, sometimes very well, chances are they will spot a false statement from you.
This will make you look rather unserious. They may even begin to question themselves “What was I even thinking when I decided to profess my love/friendship/marriage proposal to this jerk? He/she doesn’t even worth me”. You wouldn’t what that, would you?
3. Do it Face-to-Face
For me, breaking up or rejecting someone by doing it face to face is the best. It tells or shows them that you have regard for them. This will make it easier for them to accept your rejection.
However, you could send them a sweet text message conveying your intention. A text message like:
“Hello there. Good day and I hope this message meets you in a good mood and sound health. I just texted to let you know I have thought well about your offer for love/marriage/friendship well, and this is the decision I have come up with. There is no better way to say this, but I believe you deserve better – someone way better than me…”
As good as the above message may seem, saying it physically sounds way better than saying it over a text message.
4. Do it Yourself
As tempting as it is to send someone else because you’re not confident, say a member of your family, or friend, do it yourself. Be bold, be confident, and most importantly, be nice while conveying your message.
The benefit of doing it yourself to them is that they see you as a person worth their time and space even though they obviously know you aren’t interested or available. In addition, they will respect you as someone with courtesy and a sense of humour. Moreover, you get to benefit from doing the rejection yourself by them seeing you in whatever nice way they see you.
5. Avoid Giving False Hope
Always put it at the back of your mind that you are doing this because you do not have the time, space, or heart to accommodate them. Stick to that. Therefore, be straightforward.
All your statements and actions should be tailored in that direction and not anything contrary. For instance, they like seeing messages from you, they like to sit close to you always, they like being with you – just the two of you, they like you assisting them in doing some stuff, do not avail them the opportunity of having all of those all the time. Reduce it significantly or do not do it again if you genuinely know you do not want them.
Well, that doesn’t stop you from being nice to them, but not in a way that will send them a wrong signal.
6. Don’t Mention Their Flaws
As you begin to talk, remember, avoid mentioning their flaws. For instance, you are turning down a girl/guy for reason been that they smell terribly bad always, can’t cook, dress badly, are unreligious etcetera. Do not say that to them. Avoid mentioning any attribute about them that is negative. Remember, the aim is to be seen as nice after the show.
However, look for positive attributes and say a little about them. Do not concentrate on that though. For instance, you could say:
“… you are beautiful/handsome, I envy your intellect and I love how honest you are to me by seeing me worthy of being a part of your life…”
This will make you sound nice and good.
7. Be More Focused on Your Needs
We humans have our individual needs as regards whom we want to be friends with, have a relationship with, teamwork with, marry, etc. Here, concentrate more on your needs as a person. For instance, if you are that kind of person who focuses or gives more attention to your carrier and have little or no time for love, you could say:
“I’m grateful and thrilled by your offer and I can’t be happier than I already am by it. However, I’m in a moment where my career is my top priority. I do not mean to sound rude but the truth needs to be told. The time I’m needed most by my carrier is now and I spend a lot of time attending to it. Putting you now in the equation will only worsen my situation because I will be having less time for you, and truly, you deserve better…”
Please, do not mention any of their needs. That could mess up all the things you have said or will say.
8. Don’t Make Them Wait for Long
Sometimes, turning down someone could be scary most especially if you are heavily indebted to that person. The best way to avoid being in that kind of position is by refusing gratitude from anyone except when it becomes highly necessary.
Nevertheless, do not be scared, do not feel ungrateful, and do not hesitate. In other words, do not make them wait for long. Do it the moment you find a suitable opportunity to.
9. Do It at the Right Time
Just because you do not want them and you have prepared for it and gathered the courage to meet them, shouldn’t make you selfish. Endeavour to do it at the appropriate time. For instance, you do not want to turn down someone even if it is politely while they are in a bad mood, or when they are ill, lost a dear one, did badly in an examination or interview, or the likes. I guess no. You will want to reject them while they are somewhere in between being happy and sad.
Timing is very key whenever you want to do something in life, not only turning down someone. So, target the right time.
Conclusion
Nobody wants to be rejected in any way, but because we don’t always get what we want or need, there is bound to be rejection here and there. You may want someone but they may not want you back. That’s life for you. Nonetheless, if you have to turn down someone politely, you could use the above-mentioned ways to accomplish that.
If you find this article helpful, kindly share with us what you think in the comments section. More so, you could also tell us how you got to turn down someone politely as well. Meanwhile, if you tried to get someone to forgive you and they didn’t, try these ways.
by Happiness Hassan | Sep 27, 2021 | Family & Parenting
First off, marriage is a necessity and not a compulsory role to fulfil. However, for those getting married, it’s an honourable act that demands a great deal of courage and advice to scale through. Perhaps, if you have a daughter intending to get married, don’t hesitate to sit her down and offer her marriage advice to daughters who are intending to get married. This advice is important because marriage is a lifetime commitment and not a child’s play.
However, the father’s advice to daughters getting married is quite similar to the mother’s advice to daughters getting married, although they occupy two different positions in a marriage, it certainly takes two individuals who are heading in the same direction to make a marriage successful and blossoming.
15 Things You Should Tell Your Daughter Intending to Get Married
1. Genuine Love as a Crucial Advice to a Daughter Getting Married
When it comes to marriage, love is the foundation that keeps every other aspect of marriage together. That’s why one must get married to someone they truly love, not under the influence of external factors like money, family name, coercion among others.
As parents offering marriage advice to daughters ensure to tell them that marriage is all about sacrifice, oftentimes choosing one’s partner’s choice over theirs and this is only possible when there is genuine love—not determined by what one’s partner does right or wrong.
2. Let Her Know That Patience and Tolerance are Keys to a Happy Marriage
The pathway of marriage isn’t all rosy, there will always come a time of ups and downs. However, learning how to be patient with one’s partner will avert misunderstanding. Similarly, tolerating your partner’s flaws will help your marriage grow.
Perhaps, you feel your partner’s decisions aren’t right or his behaviors are inappropriate. Don’t make the mistake of trying to change him by nagging, or forcing your will on him, or depriving him of certain marital benefits. Rather, choose to advise him calmly, stating your reason and allow him to decide for himself.
3. Learn the Attitude of Understanding to Build Your Marriage
Understanding one’s partner is one of the mother’s advice to daughters getting married since mothers are capable of influencing their husband’s decisions either positively or negatively. In other words, a good wife must have an understanding attitude.
This is reflected in her level of compliance and cooperation with her husband’s decisions in terms of planning and utilizing the family budget. Also, how skillful she is at managing the available resources provided by her husband?
4. Respect is a Pivotal Advice to a Daughter Getting Married
Amongst a father’s advice to daughters getting married, respect should be given higher priority. It’s fruitless trying to contend for authority in a home with one’s husband, you only succeed at destroying your marriage. That’s why respect for husbands remains an important piece of marriage advice to daughters getting married. They must realize that submission does not show weakness rather respect—this was designed by God who initiated marriage from the beginning.
In addition, respect is revealed in your speech and actions towards your husband. Hence, you must learn the 7c’s of communication and effective listening skills.
5. Father’s Advice to Daughters Getting Married Includes Having Trust for Her Husband
The absence of trust breeds curiosity in a marriage which further breaks the love bond between couples. Hence, daughters getting married must learn to trust their partners. Instead of unnecessarily monitoring your partner, ask questions about their movement and activities you are unsure about. Furthermore, avoid keeping secrets and telling lies to your partners.
6. Faithfulness and Commitment Propels the Growth of a Marriage
It was earlier established that marriage is a lifetime commitment. Therefore, one must be wise at choosing the one you will spend the rest of your life with. In other words, you must be content with your partner in every aspect, this includes physically, financially, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and otherwise. Faithfulness and commitment are marriage advice to daughters getting married which entails sticking with their partner through the thick and thin of life without betrayal.
7. Be Willing to Grow as You Get Married
Growth is a gradual process that requires the patient to achieve. Therefore, be willing to learn from your partner and be quick to discard ideologies that may hinder your marriage progress. Most importantly, maturity insists that you embrace the roles that are meant for you as the wife and do it effectively with complaints and grumbling.
8. Inculcate the Act Of Forgiveness to Build Your Marriage
Forgiveness can’t be excluded from marriage advice to daughters getting married. This is because misunderstanding is inevitable in a relationship. However, what keeps that relationship blossoming is the ability for each partner to humble themselves and seek forgiveness when wrong or be quick to forgive the other when offended. This should be done before the day goes out for peace and love to reign—remember a prolonged misunderstanding can destroy a happy home, instead be the first to seek for settlement.
9. Become a Supportive Wife to Your Husband
Mother’s advice to daughters getting married also entails having a supportive spirit. It takes two to make a relationship work out. Therefore, as a woman, you must become your husband’s biggest fan and encourage him to become the best version of himself even when he doesn’t believe in himself.
Furthermore, It’s detrimental to your marriage to expose your husband’s flaws to others, in contrast, learn to be proud of him.
10. Advice to Daughter Getting Married Includes Prioritizing Your Sex Life
Sex in itself goes beyond physical intercourse, rather is a medium where souls are joined together as one—a point of intimacy. The value of sex in a marriage can’t be overemphasized.
Therefore, what matters most is the quality and not quantity. Most importantly, study your partner’s sex life to get it right. In addition, it’s wrong to punish your husband for offending you by denying him sex.
11. Reduce Third-Party Advice to the Minimum Level to Achieve a Happy Marriage
Excluding you and your partner, every other person is a third party. These sets of people are those who believe they can offer you marriage advice and insist you keep them updated about the happenings in your marriage. That’s inappropriate! Besides, I’m not saying that receiving advice from others is completely wrong, rather establishing the fact that whatever is discussed between you and your partner should remain between the both of you.
Also, your decisions shouldn’t be influenced by what others are saying. However, the only time a third party is needed is when there is a misunderstanding beyond your control— this must be a trustworthy person.
12. Learn to do Things Together
A home where the husband and wife are on two separate pages will soon break apart. Hence, spice your marriage up by making time for each other—a time away from work, that’s why you need to learn how to balance your work and family. In addition, create time to pray together, eat together and do household chores together. Oftentimes, most mother’s advice to daughters getting married always emphasizes praying for one’s partner and praying together as couples.
13. Never Ignore Your Partner’s Needs When Kids Arrive
Parenting is a unit under a marriage that must be carefully carried out to prevent committing parenting mistakes that should be avoided which are detrimental. Therefore, don’t choose your kid’s needs over your husband’s needs. Instead, get your partner to assist you with the kids. Don’t forget he is also their father.
Furthermore, kids become creative thinkers under the atmosphere of a loving home, this further boosts their academic performance.
14. Learn About Your Partner’s Love Language
Father’s advice to daughters getting married requires orienting them on how little act of love counts and goes a long way in securing the future of your marriage. In essence, be skilful at examining your partner’s likes and dislikes—discarding the dislikes and doing more of his likes.
This study enables you to speak your partner’s love languages and prevents you from guessing your way through marriage.
15. Divorce Should Be the Last Option on Your List to Build a Perfect Marriage
There will be a time when you feel like walking out of your marriage because it seems things aren’t going as expected. That’s why a mother’s advice to daughters getting married always encourages daughters to seek other routes of problem-solving excluding divorce.
Reason being that the effect of divorce is destructive and doesn’t portray you as a role model for your children to imitate.
Conclusion
Marriage advise to daughters getting married can’t be exhausted. However, what matters most is your ability to practice the advice given when you get to your husband’s house. Although, it will take some time to adapt, don’t give up, choose to keep giving in your best.
Do you have more advice to daughter getting married or have learned a thing or two from this article? If yes, join the chat by sharing in the comment section below.
