I Was a Victim of Child Bullying at School And This is What I Learned

Written by Happiness Hassan

Happiness Hassan is an eloquent writer and an avid reader. She is obsessed with her faith and loves assisting women to become a better version of themselves. Her progress in life is a direct impact of her parent's endless support. That's why she is keen on self-development, parenting, and family niche. She realizes how a healthy relationship between parents and their kids can make our world a better place. In her spare time, she listens to motivational audios. In addition, she enjoys decorating, dancing, singing, and crossword puzzles.

May 12, 2021

Child bullying at school has been in existence for over centuries. However, during the last two decades, it has evolved into different forms. So, while parents, guidance, and teachers are on the watch-out for physical signs of bullying there seem to be rare cases of their search. The reason has been that bullying goes beyond physical attacks and has other unnoticeable signs.

I was a victim of bullying in grade 3. I still recall the pain I went through as a new student who had no friends. Furthermore, I was alone, therefore vulnerable to bullies. It began from verbal bullying due to my small feeble body stature. Then it resulted in stealing my belongings, I was inferior and kept everything to myself. 

This continued for weeks. My mom noticed my insecure appearance, low self-esteem, and sudden dislike for school, although she wasn’t sure what was going on she kept monitoring me. One day, After school, the usual bully gangs who termed themselves tough kids seized my bag while I retaliated. I got pushed off the stairs. It became obvious that I was bullied at school when I returned home with a series of bruises on my body. My parents took fierce action when they discovered what was going on.

I hate child bullying at school because I was a victim and can relate to all other kids going through similar or worse cases of bullying. Therefore, in this post, I will be sharing everything you need to know about bullying and how I overcame bullying.

What is Bullying?

This is an abuse of power over others by the virtue of being superior to them using verbal and physical means to intimidate others. This behaviour is dangerous and leads to psychological and physical harm. 

What are the Forms of Bullying?

1. Physical Bullying

This is the most common type of child bullying at school because its effects can’t be hidden. Therefore, physical bullying is the use of physical strength to humiliate and hurt others who are less defensive.

Usually, physical bullies are stronger and bigger than their peers. It could be in the form of kicking, punching, slapping, pushing, hitting, and slamming.

2. Emotional Bullying

This form of bullying involves a behavioral attempt to make others feel left behind. These are tactics employed to exclude someone out of a particular clique, creating a feeling of loneliness and isolation in the victim. Oftentimes, parents and teachers overlook this form of bullying and advise kids to get over it. But that won’t solve the problem as it affects their emotional coordination.

This form includes spreading lies, disclosing secrets, ganging up with others to tarnish someone else’s reputations and breakage of trust. Common among the female gender.

3. Verbal Bullying

This takes the form of name-calling to embarrass someone. Also, the use of hurting/hideous languages and words to humiliate another. Verbal bullies use the weaknesses and physical challenges of their victims to attack them.

These effects are not seen physically but lead to internal injuries and destroy the self-esteem of their victims.

4. Sexual Bullying

Hurting someone sexually, either physical or non-physical. It’s also an attempt to reduce someone’s reputation by using sexual language, gestures, and violence.

In addition, It involves inappropriate touching without consent, forcing the victim into sex texting, indulge in promiscuous acts, and exposing something about their sexual life. 

5. Cyberbullying

This is becoming predominant in our tech-savvy generation. Cyberbullies go under cover of the screen on various social media platforms to degrade others through hurtful comments, slander, the spread of rumours, sharing embarrassing images, threaten and harass their victims. 

6. Prejudicial Bullying

This form of child bullying at school is carried out to humiliate others because of their race, religion, skin colour, background, weaknesses, health challenges, and sexual orientation. This usually results in restrictions and isolation of the victim. For instance, the segregation of new kids or kids from poor homes who are less privileged.

How to Tell if Your Kids are Being bullied

  • Mood swing
  • Self-isolation
  • Anxiety
  • Depression
  • Lack of confidence
  • Lost of interest in studies
  • Unexplainable bruises
  • Secretiveness
  • Unnecesary Anger
  • Aggressiveness
  • Poor academic performance
  • Appear insecure
  • Missing and damaged belongings
  • Changes in eating pattern
  • Withdrawl from normal lifestyle
  • Adiction to alcohol or drugs

What Can Be Done?

To eliminate child bullying at school there is a need for cooperation between parents, their kids, and teachers.

1. Keep A Close Watch On Your Kids

Victims of bullying are secretive about what they’re experiencing due to fear of the unknown. Therefore, as a parent be quick to detect the signs of bullying. In addition, don’t be carried away by your career, goals, and business while your kids suffer secretly.

Furthermore, keep a check on their behaviours, social life, friends, social media handles, and also their academic performance.

2. Alert the School if You Noticed Anything Strange About Your Child

Peradventure, you notice your kids have been bullied at school. Let the school authority know about it. This helps the school management to enforce rules against bullying. Oftentimes, parents prefer to change their kid’s school instead of speaking up thinking it will solve the issues. However, that won’t solve the problem rather alert the school management.

3. Listen to Your Kids

Create a conducive atmosphere where your kids can open up their deepest feelings and secrets to you. Don’t also shut them out with a strict mood. Make yourself approachable, so your kids can walk up to you confidently if they are experiencing any form of bullying.

4. Teach Your Kids to be Bold

Exercising boldness when faced with a bullying situation will scare away bullies. This is one of the practical techniques my mom taught me. The next day at school, my bullies forcefully took my bag expecting me to retaliate. Instead, I spoke back with boldness, ordering them to hand my bag over, or I go report a teacher. Seeing the boldness in me, they knew they had lost grip on their victim.

5. Teach Your Kids Not to Stay Alone

Kids become victims of bullying when they isolate themselves from others. Advise your kids to move around open spaces with lots of people at school. In short, they should sit at the front in class. In addition, let them make trusted friends who can look out for them. 

6. Teach Your Kids How to Seek Help

Furthermore, When away from your kids, encourage them to tell a trusted adult when they have been threatened by bullies. They should trust their teachers to help if they don’t feel comfortable around certain persons.

7. Teach Your Kids About Social Media Platforms 

Social media has its benefits. however, there are disadvantages such as exposure to cyberbullying. Hence, give your kids guidelines to follow on social media, chat rooms to avoid, and sites not to visit. Ensuring your kids are safe online is one of the tactics in combating child bullying at school.

8. Set Rules and Policy

As school management, it’s your responsibility to set rules regulating the behaviours and activities of students. Moreover, those caught in the act must face the consequences for their actions to serve as an example for others.

9. Active Guidance and Counseling is Needed to curtail Bullying

Regularly, students should be counselled on the right conduct of behaviour and how to relate with their fellow students. Also, It’s the responsibility of the school to teach the students disadvantages of negative behaviour and also the advantages of positive behaviour. 

10. Teachers Should Get Involved in Eradicating Bullying

As a teacher, you need to monitor your students and look out for any act of bullying among them. You should separate their seats to avoid close contact. If there is any who is physically deformed or appears weak in your class, you need to move their seat forward and keep a close eye on them.

Conclusion

The above-mentioned ways are tactics to combat child bullying at school. However, those who are bullies come from homes which means they might have learned such behaviour from their respective families. In essence, give your kids a proper upbringing, so they portray decent behaviour when outside the home. In addition, be a role model for your kids to imitate.

Furthermore, don’t hesitate to share your views in the comment section below.

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